


Dark Beauty

by OliversMuse



Category: Arrow - Fandom, Felicity Smoak - Fandom, Oliver Queen - Fandom, mob - Fandom, olicity - Fandom
Genre: Acceptance, Doctor/Patient, Felicity is dark but Oliver becomes her light, Love, Mention of Oliver and Laurel having dated but she is not in this story, PTSD, Resolved Sexual Tension, Slade and Felicity engaged for mob reasons only; no love there, Smut, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Violence, mob
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-04
Updated: 2019-09-14
Packaged: 2020-06-03 17:00:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 47,487
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19468258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OliversMuse/pseuds/OliversMuse
Summary: Meet Dr. Oliver Queen, local psychiatrist who specializes in PTSD due to his own experiences. He has finally settled into a normal life and his practice is going well. Then one day in walks Felicity Smoak, local mob boss. She is looking to change her ways, to escape the violence and death that has been her reality for far too long. She wants to change but her business keeps dragging her back to that dark place she is trying to escape. Can Dr. Queen see the light inside of her and help her change her ways??





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys so this fic is being written for my dear sweet friend @olida_magda. She has been patiently waiting for this story for months and I am so very happy to finally be able to write this for her. She also made the wonderful banner. This story is going to explore the dark side of Felicity and allow Oliver to be her light. I really hope you guys will give this fic a chance and that you will enjoy it. If this is not your cup of tea then please check out the other amazing fics on AO3. 
> 
> As always thank you to my wonderful beta @judylittle.
> 
> Please leave comments and kudos. They feed my muse.
> 
> Tweeted as a Best Olicity Fic by @BestOlicityFics on 2/10/2020. 
> 
> Thank you.

Felicity sat in the back of the limousine staring at the non-descript five story building that was in front of her. She was here to see one of the premier psychiatrists in Star City, but she could not seem to move from her seat. She had seen an article in the Star City News about Oliver Queen and after reading the article she had found herself making an appointment. It had been a secretive act; something that the people she normally associated with would not understand, and luckily her driver John Diggle was loyal. He would not say a word.

He lowered the partition and looked at her through the rearview mirror, his brown eyes filled with compassion. John had been Felicity’s driver since she was 15 and now, ten years later he thought of her like a sister. He was the best friend she had. He was the only friend she had.

“You don’t have to do this you know.”

She kept staring at the building. “Yes, I do John. If I don’t this life is going to slowly steal my soul.”

What could he say to that? He knew she was right. He had watched her grow up in one of the largest mob families in Star City and when her parents were murdered five years ago, he had watched her grow up fast. She was now the head of the most powerful mob family in Star City and she had the scars to prove it.

Growing up as a Cutler had been difficult at its best. When Felicity took over for her father she had to prove herself to his men and they had not been easy on her. The night after her parents died instead of grieving she had been going toe to toe with some of Star City’s most deadly enforcers. She had come away with scars on her body, some of the enforcers had ended up dead.

Five years of running the family and living in the middle of the death and violence had taken its toll and that was why she was here today. She needed an outlet; a way to work through the feelings that shooting a man begging for his life could bring. She had done that many times and some of the men she could still hear begging in her sleep.

She let out a breath and then gave John a small smile. “I guess I can’t put it off any longer.”

“I will be right here waiting Felicity.”

She put on her sunglasses, stepped out of the car and walked into the building her nerves on edge, but her eyes darted all around taking in her surroundings and anyone crossing her path. It was a habit she had acquired early in life and she walked to the elevator and hit the up button. Several people eyed her as they passed because when you saw Felicity Cutler you noticed two things. The first was she was beautiful. Her blonde hair, blue eyes and short stature made her stand out in even the densest of crowds. Two, her eyes were cold.

Felicity stepped onto the elevator and hit the fifth floor. She checked to make sure her phone was off. It might seem that she was paranoid, but she did not want anyone to trace her phone. In her line of work if you were found weak you were challenged and seeing a psychiatrist was a sign of weakness.

The doors opened, and she stepped off, seeing the office for Dr. Oliver Queen right in front of her. She walked in and approached the young woman who was sitting behind the receptionist desk.

Felicity removed her sunglasses and gave her a slight smile.

“Hi, my name is Felicity Smoak and I have a 1:00 p.m., appointment.” She had decided to use her mother’s maiden name when she made her appointment. It was harder to trace and hearing it out loud brought forward a few good memories.

The young woman quickly typed into her computer and a smile lit up her face. “Of course, Ms. Smoak. Please have a seat and I will let Dr. Queen know you have arrived.”

Felicity walked over and took a seat one of the plush couches that lined the waiting area. There were four wing back chairs, a bookshelf with books and magazines and a TV that was showing mental health ads and a few moments later a door to the left of the receptionist desk opened and she heard her name being called.

“Ms. Smoak, if you will follow me.”

The receptionist led her through the door and to an office to the left and motioned for her to go in and have a seat.

“Dr. Queen is on the phone with a patient in the other room. He said he should only be a few more minutes. Would you like some water or anything?”

The young woman smiled kindly at her, but Felicity just shook her head. “No thank you.”

The woman nodded and then closed the door behind her and Felicity looked around the office curiously. It was neatly kept with bookshelves along the wall behind the beautiful mahogany desk. She noted a few pictures that she assumed was his family and the degrees he had framed on the far wall. There was a couch and chair to the left of the door and another closed door to the right of the desk.

Felicity turned defensively as the door opened and a man walked into the room looking down at a book in his hand. Felicity relaxed as she realized he must be the doctor and he looked up at her and smiled.

“Felicity Smoak? Oliver Queen.” He held out his hand to her, but Felicity had to catch her breath as she looked into the bluest eyes she had ever seen. Her eyes traveled over blondish brown hair that was short and spikey, and he had on a pair of black framed glasses that did nothing to detract from his extremely good looks. He had a chiseled jaw that held the right amount of scruff and as her eyes traveled down she noted a crisp white button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up to the elbows. They showcased strong forearms with veins criss crossing underneath tan skin and she could tell he had a chiseled chest as well. He was way too good looking to be a shrink.

He cleared his throat to get her attention as he held her hand and waited for her to respond. She finally gave him a cool smile that she had practiced a million times over.

“Dr. Queen. It is a pleasure to meet you.”

He let go of her hand and walked around his desk placing the book to the side.

“I have to say I am surprised to see you here.”

She lifted an eyebrow at him, “Oh?”

“It’s not everyday the head of the most powerful mob family in Star City calls and makes an appointment with me. I feel honored.”

She gave him a startled look. “How did you know who I am?”

“Well two things. Felicity is not a common name and I have seen the papers and the tabloids. Your face is not one I would easily forget Ms. Smoak.”

He gave her and indulgent smile, his blue eyes dancing. “So, what brings you to my office today?”

Felicity felt her nerves fire up. She was always a confident woman but being here looking into this man’s eyes was very unnerving. Why could she not have chosen a psychiatrist who was fat and balding?

Felicity grew a little more uncomfortable as the attention turned to her and why she was here. How did you explain to someone that you were trying to save your soul? That the things you had to do in your lifetime were so horrific and so cold that the darkness inside of you was overwhelming. How did she tell him that she felt irredeemable?

He continued to watch her with those intense blue eyes and she finally said, “How do I know that I can trust you?”

Oliver watched the woman before him and many thoughts ran through his head. He knew who she was. Everyone knew her. She was the mob princess turned mob boss that ran the biggest crime organization in Star City. Of course, that was all speculation. She was beautiful; hauntingly so. She carried herself with an air of cold indifference but sitting before him, he could see the young woman who was unsure and vulnerable. He also noted that she had PTSD. He recognized it as soon as he walked in the room. The way she had tensed at the opening of the door. The way her eyes had looked at him for the briefest of moments. He saw all these things but more importantly, he saw her.

Oliver leaned forward and placed his arms on his desk, his fingers intertwining. “You don’t.”

That was not the answer that she was expecting and at that moment she felt like getting up and walking out. Maybe this had been a mistake.

Oliver could see the conflict in her beautiful blue eyes and he stood and walked around his desk. Leaning back against it he waited until she met his eyes.

“It’s called faith Felicity. I am here to help you with whatever is worrying you. I am here to listen and, in some cases, give you some advice. But more importantly I am here to guide you through whatever darkness is eating away at you.” He paused as her eyes flickered with just a hint of uncertainty. “I am here for you Felicity, that you can trust.”

She looked into his eyes and saw the sincerity there. It has been a long time since she had ever taken a leap of faith. Maybe it was time she did again.

Felicity stood, and Oliver worried that she was going to walk out. It took some people two or three visits before they opened to him. But she surprised him. She walked over to the window that looked out over Star City. She kept her back to him as she spoke.

“I need someone to talk to about my life. Someone I can confide in before this life withers me away to where I am nothing but a cold shell.” Oliver waited and then she turned and looked at him. “I am going to tell you some things about my life that are dark and unpleasant. Things I have done that are unforgiveable.”

“I don’t judge.”

She gave him a cold laugh, “I wouldn’t say that too soon Dr. Queen. I have lived in this dark place for so long that I truly believe if I died today that I would spend the rest of eternity in the deepest, darkest pit of hell.”

Oliver found that remark interesting and he crossed his arms over his chest.

“I don’t expect you to redeem me Dr. Queen. I am irredeemable. But I am hoping that you can help me deal with what I have done and learn to channel the blackness, before it swallows me whole.”

Oliver’s eyes were intense as he watched her, and then he said something that gave her the smallest pin prick of hope.

“No one is irredeemable Ms. Smoak. Not even you.” 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> @olida_magda made another fabulous poster with our sexy Dr. Queen in glasses. Love it!!

Oliver walked over and sat down in the chair and looked at Felicity as she turned back to the window. “For someone who is asking about trust you turned your back on me fairly easily.” He wrote a few notes in a notepad and Felicity turned to him with a small smile.

“You learn pretty quickly how to test someone in my business.”

“So that was a test for me?” Interesting.

Felicity walked over and sat down on the couch. “Yes.”

Oliver gave her a curious look, “And how did it test me? What did it prove to you?”

Felicity sat back and crossed her legs and Oliver could not help the way his eyes flickered down to them before he met her eyes. She smirked, men were so easy to distract.

“Most men cannot handle when a woman turns her back to him. They want to be the focus of attention. My turning my back to you did not bother you. That tells me two things.” A tilt of her lips at the corner almost betrayed a smile.

“Please continue, I am intrigued.”

“One, it tells me that you are comfortable with women in power. They don’t bother you or make you feel uncomfortable.”

“And the second thing?”

“You didn’t kill me. That tells me you are not working for them.”

Her comment took Oliver completely by surprise and frankly it startled him. “Them?”

“My enemies. The one’s who want to see me dead.”

“Why would you think I would be working for the mob?” He was curious to hear her answer. “You came to me.”

“Things are not all that they seem sometimes Dr. Queen. I have had to learn to be extremely cautious. I don’t trust easily, and I know from experience that things can happen in the places that you think you are the safest.”

“Such as?” He took more notes. She was quite fascinating, and he was finding that he was enjoying their session.

Ok Felicity. It was time to either take a leap of faith or get up and walk out of the room.

“Last year I was almost killed by the Giovanni family. Their hitman broke into my home and came into my room. The fact that he was able to do that made an impression on me and told me that they can get to me anywhere at any time.”

Oliver’s head tilted as he looked at her with those blue eyes, “Yet here you are sitting in front of me, alive.”

“When you sleep with a knife under your pillow every night you learn to use it well. He was dead before he even realized that I was awake.”

Oliver stared at her for a moment. This beautiful woman that looked as fragile as the most delicate flower had a spine of steel and he was finding that he liked that about her.

“Felicity let me be very frank with you. I want to help you. I promise that anything you tell me in this room will stay in this room. You can lay all your demons down here. No one is going to judge you, certainly not me.”

Felicity tapped a ruby red fingernail against her lips, they matched her nail polish and Oliver was finding it hard not to stare at them.

“You suffer from PTSD as well.”

She noted Oliver stiffen in front of her. Most people would not have noted the subtle change in his demeanor, but she always noticed the small things about everyone she interacted with. She saw the change.

“I do. I have it well under control but having PTSD is what makes me an expert in this field. I know exactly what the person, or rather what you, are feeling. I know what you are going through.”

That made Felicity stiffen. He had made it personal. He had just told her what she already knew deep in her soul. She knew she suffered from PTSD. The panic attacks that would hit her out of nowhere were a testament to that. However, hearing those words from his lips was still hard.

“Don’t act like you know me from one visit Dr. Queen.”

“Oh, it is not an act Miss Kutler.” Oliver leaned forward and placed his pad and paper on the table in front of him. “I see you and that is making you very uncomfortable.”

Damn, why did the man have to be right? It was making her very uncomfortable. She preferred to keep those places inside of her hidden from everyone. She knew she was going to have to dig into those places when she came here but having him scratch at the surface so quickly was extremely unnerving.

She stood ready to walk out and Oliver stood as well. “Felicity. Here.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out his business card. Taking his pen, he scribbled something onto the back. “This is my cell number. Please call me anytime day or night. Also, I would like to see you again in two days.”

Felicity gave him a suspicious look, but she took the card.

“Do you give your cell number to all of your patients Dr. Queen?”

He smiled, “No. You are the first.”

She looked down at the phone number and then tucked it into her purse.

“Two days Felicity.” He watched her walk to the door and when he heard her response he laughed.

“Goodbye Dr. Queen.”

She did not look back as she placed her sunglasses on her face and walked out of the office. It was not until she got onto the elevator that she could be vulnerable for just a moment and she slumped against the wall. That had been hard, and she knew before this whole process was over that it was going to get harder. But she also knew that if she wanted a different life. If she wanted a family and to be able to love and have someone love her in return that it was a journey she had to take. She took his card out and stared down at his handwriting. Maybe having him in her corner was not so bad.

John was waiting patiently by the curb when she emerged and if it was anyone else watching her they would have seen a confident beautiful woman emerging looking as if she owned the world. But John knew better. He saw the resignation in her shoulders and the way she was pursing her lips. He quietly opened the door for her and then walked around and got behind the wheel.

No words were said as he slid the partition in to place to give her some privacy. None were needed.

***

Oliver walked back to his desk and sat down with a perplexed look on his face. Ok, Felicity Smoak or rather Felicity Cutler was an enigma. Looking at her she exuded a quiet confidence and hardness that had probably intimidated the hardest of men. She had to be that way. But for the briefest of moments he had seen the vulnerable women beneath and he had been drawn to her.

He second guessed his decision to give her his cell number, but something had made him do it and he sat back and wrote down a few more notes before he threw his pad and pen on his desk and removed his glasses. He rubbed his nose with his thumb and forefinger as he thought back to the things that had gotten him to this point. He was a successful psychiatrist and looking at him from the outside you would almost envy him. But there was also a loneliness there. Situations in his life had caused him to develop PTSD and that PTSD had led him to becoming a psychiatrist. He wanted to understand the thing that in one instance could rip your insides apart.

Oliver finished up some paperwork and then bid his receptionist goodnight as he made his way to his car. He needed to stop thinking about her and he pulled out his phone and dialed the one person that could help with that.

“Hey Tommy. You up for a few beers at The Powder Keg?”

“Why Oliver Queen. Are you asking me on a date?” Tommy had been Oliver’s best friend since childhood and was one of the only people in his life that knew everything about him. He was also a person that tried not to take life seriously and so Oliver had to take his ribbing in stride.

“Do you want a beer or not?” Oliver tried not to let his lips twitch into a smile.

“Yep, but your buying Queen.”

They hung up and Oliver drove to the bar that was a few blocks away from his condo. Tommy lived close by, so it was a regular hangout for them and the one place, other than his home, where Oliver could completely relax.

Oliver walked into the bar and gave a nod to the bartender as he walked to the booth where Tommy was already seated sipping a beer. Tommy smile up at him but when Oliver did not return his smile he leaned forward with concern.

“You ok Oliver?”

Oliver sat down heavily his entire body ready to just relax.

“It was a busy day.”

Tommy gave him a piercing look of concern and Oliver nodded, “I am fine Tommy. Tired but fine.”

Tommy was always concerned about his best friend. He had known him his whole life and had been with him during good times and bad. The bad times included some of his PTSD episodes and they usually came on when Oliver was tired, and his defenses were down so Tommy had learned to be vigilant when he was with his friend. Oliver’s episodes were few and far between now but they still could come out of nowhere and so he always watched him intently.

A waitress brought Oliver his beer and he took a swig before setting it on the table. “So, tell me about your day Tommy. How are things going at the club?”

Tommy shrugged. Tommy came from a wealthy family. His mother died when he was just eight and his father had been an abusive asshole. Despite that Tommy had carved out a place for himself by opening a club called Azul. He had worked it to the point it was the most hopping club in Star City. Oliver never really went there because clubs were not his scene and the strobe lights would sometimes trigger his PTSD, but he was always there to support Tommy when he needed it.

“Business is good. In fact, I am looking at opening a second club in Central City.”

“Congratulations man that is wonderful news.” Oliver lifted his beer bottle and they toasted to Azul’s success.

“Now, you have deflected long enough. What is going on with you Oliver. I have not seen you in weeks and Thea had to be the one to tell me that you and Laurel broke things off.”

Oliver sighed. He really didn’t want to talk about his ex-girlfriend, but he might as well get it over with because Tommy was not going to stop asking until he knew everything.

“She was pressuring me to move in together and I had enough. I finally realized that I had been putting it off because I just don’t love her. I think that that ship sailed long ago.”

“Whew, I am sure she was not happy about that.”

“No, in fact she threw my things out of her apartment window. Luckily I had not left a lot of things there.”

They both laughed. Tommy was not surprised that Oliver had finally broken up with Laurel. They had been dating for two years and as much as Laurel had tried to pressure him to move in with her Oliver had always resisted. That coupled with the fact that Oliver had never been comfortable sharing everything about his past with her had led to this day. Tommy had always felt Laurel had been toxic for Oliver and he was glad that Oliver had finally seen that.

“How about you? What happened with that Vicky girl you were seeing?”

Tommy grinned and shrugged. “Found out she was seeing me and one other guy.”

Oliver grimaced.

“Oh, don’t get me wrong, I am not ready for any type of serious relationship, but you know me. Honesty is important, and I told her from the beginning that if she was going to see someone else to let me know. She seemed to have forgotten that bit of information. I found her at Table Salt with him having dinner.”

“Ouch, sorry man.”

“No problem. I have moved on to Tammy. Blonde hair, blue eyes and a body that…. Well, let’s just say we have no issues in the bedroom.” Oliver rolled his eyes as Tommy grinned, but he was happy for his friend. He knew Tommy had always teased that he would be a bachelor until he was sixty, but he also knew that Tommy was really looking for a serious relationship and he just prayed he would find one.

“So, when are you going to get back out there?”

Oliver shook his head as Tommy’s words sank in, “Oh not anytime soon.”

“Come on man, I am sure that Tammy has a friend.”

Oliver took a sip of his beer. “No. I am good Tommy. Right now, I just want to focus on my practice.”

“Business has been good then?”

Oliver nodded and thought of Felicity. “It has been great and definitely has gotten more interesting now that I am on my own.”

“Well I know the hospital is going to miss having their favorite shrink down the hall, but I could not be happier for you man.” He tipped his beer to Oliver.

Oliver had to get his mind off Felicity, so they spent the rest of the evening making plans to attend a baseball game soon and after a few beers they both decided it was time to go. Oliver threw some bills on the table and as they walked to their car Tommy turned and looked at him.

“Your looking good man. A lot more relaxed then I have seen you in a long time.”

Oliver gave him a small smile, “Thanks man. I am glad to have things done with Laurel and now I just plan on moving forward.”

They gave each other a hug and made plans to meet again in a few days.

Oliver decided to leave his car at the bar. He only lived about a block away and he didn’t feel like driving. The night was beautiful, and the air was clean and so he took off down the block. Freeing himself from Laurel had been the best thing he had done in a long time. His practice was going well, and the clients were calling him for appointments left and right.

His mind wandered back to Felicity and he hoped that she would make an appointment to see him again in two days. He was looking forward to it.

***

Felicity stepped out of the limousine and threw John a thank you as she walked into the house. She steeled herself for what was about to come and sure enough as soon as she walked in the door he was right there hounding her.

“Where the hell have you been?”

Felicity threw Slade an annoyed look. “It’s good to see you too Slade.”

“Don’t be smart with me Felicity, as your fiancé I have a right to know where you have been.”

Felicity stopped and turned to him with ice cold eyes, “You don’t have any rights Slade. Our engagement is a business transaction only.”

Slade moved closer, “It may be business sweetheart, but it is still an engagement whether you like it or not.”

Felicity was fuming. She had been coerced into becoming engaged to Slade after members of the Cutler family started grumbling that they needed more territory. Always doing what was best for the family Felicity had agreed to become engaged to Slade Wilson. His family was strong in Star City and the two families together would be a force to be reckoned with, but as the days passed Felicity started to regret it more and more. Slade was becoming a big nuisance. His need for power overtaking every aspect of their interactions and Felicity was starting to feel that if they continued the way things were that one of them would end up dead. She just hoped it would not be her.

“Stay out of my personal business Slade, because I don’t care who your family is, if you continue to make demands of me as if you own me, I will bury you.”

Slade looked into her cold eyes and he backed off. His engagement to Felicity was something his family needed, and he could not do anything to jeopardize it.

Felicity turned and made her way upstairs to her room. She closed her door and locked it behind her and leaned against it with a sigh. She was so tired of this life. She was tired of having to pretend that she was ok with her engagement to a man she did not love. She was tired of the violence and the deaths but more important she was tired of the toll it was taking on her.

The longer she stayed in this life the colder she felt. It was chipping away at her soul.

She unzipped her dress and stepped out of her heels and leaving her clothes where they lay she took Oliver’s card from her purse and crawled into bed. She stared at the writing thinking back over her meeting with Dr. Queen.

Something about him was drawing her to him. She wanted to see him again, but she was just not sure if she should go back. If Slade found out that she was seeing a psychiatrist, he would use that against her to try and make her look weak to her men. He would love nothing more than to take over ruling the Cutler family. They were going to be married so the men would not hesitate to defer to him. She could not let that happen.

She set his card on her side table as she stared at the crisp white paper. It was like a beacon of light in her darkness and before she fell into a fitful sleep she decided tomorrow she would make her next appointment.


	3. Chapter 3

Felicity woke the next morning and after taking a quick shower she dressed for her day. Today she was going to have to deal with a rival’s lackey that had been caught snooping around the family’s docks. It was not something that she enjoyed but it was a way for her to continue to show her men that she was in charge and could take care of whatever problems were thrown their way.

She pulled on a skirt and blouse and a pair of pumps that were her favorite. Just because she had to act tough did not mean she could not dress feminine. Clothes were her one vice and she indulged herself regularly.

She made her way downstairs and nodded to the guards that were stationed throughout the hallways. Since the night the assassin had broken into her home she had upped her security and she walked to her office adopting her usual ice-cold demeanor.

Slade was waiting for her and she sighed as she walked around to her desk. She did not even give him a chance to speak. “What do you want Slade? I don’t have time for you this morning. I have to deal with Mancini’s henchman.”

Slade crossed a leg over his knee and sat back in a relaxed posture. “Why good morning to you too my love….”

“Don’t call me that.” Her tone was let him know she was not in the mood for games.

Slade smirked, “Why don’t you let me handle Mancini’s man. That is not something a woman of your “status” should have to deal with.”

Felicity felt her blood start to boil. On the surface Slade’s offer sounded helpful, but Felicity knew his tone and his tone dripped that he felt like a woman should not be dealing with anything mob related. He hated that she was in charge and would not stop until he took over the family completely.

“I can handle my own business, thank you very much.” Felicity started going through some invoices on her desk from a previous shipment, subtly dismissing Slade. He did not take the hint.

Slade leaned forward in his chair, “But why should you when you have a man that can handle it for you?”

Felicity stood and calmly walked around the desk and before he could react she had a knife to his throat.  
“You seem to forget Slade, I am capable of handling my own affairs. Now if you don’t get the hell out of my office they will find your tongue lying in the hallway.”

Slade smirked. She was a feisty one and he slowly nodded letting her know he was done for now. She backed away and he stood up and straightened his shirt.

“See you later my love.” He walked out closing the door and as it shut he heard a thud. He opened the door and looked to see her knife embedded in the wood. He gave her one last look and then shut the door behind him.

***

Felicity calmly wiped the blood from her hands, her face stoic but her eyes turbulent. It had taken torture to get the man to talk but he had not said much. Her men had watched as she did something that she did well. She cut him.

Felicity had been taught at a young age the many places you could cut a man to inflict the most pain. These places also caused the least bleeding and so bleeding out took an extremely long time. She nodded to one of her guards as he walked away. They knew what to do with the body. There needed to be a message sent to the other families that if you mess with the Cutler’s or their territory you face their wrath. This message would be just what was needed.

She walked up to her room and when she shut the door behind her she started to shake. It was always this way. Taking a man’s life was never pleasant nor easy. She slid down the door sitting against it and soon she was crying, rocking her body back and forth. She needed to get a grip on herself and take a shower, but she could not get her limbs to move.

She was not sure how long she sat there, as she thought back over the lives she had taken. There had been men who pleaded with her for their life and there had been those who had cursed her, but in the end, they had all lost their lives and it was by her hand. She often would sit and wonder what her life would have been like if she had not been born a Cutler. To be just Felicity. Someone who went to work every day, had a family and then came home every night to the man she loved. It was a dream that she only allowed herself to indulge when she was at her lowest.

She finally was able to pick herself up and she showered. As the water washed the red stains off her skin she shuddered scrubbing hard. It always left her skin red and chafed but it was the only way she could feel clean.

Throwing a towel around her body she made her way to her phone and her eyes caught a glimpse of white. His card. Before she could second guess herself, she found herself calling the number and making an appointment for the next morning.

Maybe talking would help. The dead feeling that seeped into her chest was growing stronger and she was worried that if she did not do something soon that the darkness would take over.

***

Oliver walked into his office ready to see his first patient. Ms. Cutler had not contacted his office for her next appointment and as worried as Oliver was about her he knew he could not force someone to seek help. Counseling was a choice they had to make for themselves. He looked at his calendar and soon his receptionist was buzzing him about an arrival.

“Dr. Queen there is a Megan Smoak here to see you.”

Oliver looked at the name Smoak and then it hit him. It was her. “Ok please send her in.” Oliver grabbed his pad and paper and then stood up from his desk and when she walked in a smile twitched at his lips. It was Felicity and she removed her sunglasses and gave him an unsure smile.

“Using a different name again I see.” Oliver stopped in front of her. “I am glad you came back. I was worried you had changed your mind.”

Felicity placed her sunglasses in her purse and relaxed only a little. “My fiancé was growing a little suspicious, so I decided to use my middle name with my mother’s maiden name.”

Oliver looked at her in surprise, “Fiancé?”

She walked over and sat down on the couch, waving her hand at him like it was no big deal. “It is just an engagement for convenience. We are not romantically involved.”

Oliver sat down across from her, the surprise showing on his face. “Do you want to be engaged for “convenience” Felicity?”

Wow he was asking the hard questions early. Shouldn’t he ease her into this? “I don’t want to talk about that.”

Oliver pulled back. Her announcement that she was engaged for convenience bothered him. But he had learned early on that people would talk about things when they were ready, and she obviously was not ready.

“Then what do you want to talk about?” Oliver sat back in his chair and crossed his legs setting his pad on his lap to take notes. He noted the lost look in her eyes. She must not have slept well because she had dark circles under her eyes and her face seemed gaunt. He tried to bite back his concern.

“Let’s try a different tactic. What do you want to get from our sessions Felicity?”

“Peace. A life free of murder and death and blood. So much blood.” The last three words were almost whispered, and Oliver shifted in his seat.

“Was someone hurt?”

She looked at him and smiled a cold smile. “I had to hurt someone.”

Oliver tried to hide his surprise. He could not imagine this woman hurting anyone. But he knew her life was not the easiest road. She had grown up in a world of violence and so it should be no surprise to him that she had to hurt someone. She was their leader.

“What did this person do to you?”

“He tried to take what belongs to our family.”

“Were you sending him a message?”

“I had to send the entire city a message.” He saw her hands clench by her side and he decided he needed to do something to relax her.

“Do you want to talk about that? About what you have had to do?”

“No.”

“What was the message you had to send?”

“That anyone who tries to take what is ours will pay with their life.”

“Did you take his life Felicity?”

She would not answer.

Oliver sat forward, “Let’s try something. Felicity I want you to sit back and relax. Close your eyes.” She just stared at him and he could tell she was uncomfortable. “I promise you are safe here.”

She finally sat back and giving him one last look, she closed her eyes.

“Now just listen to my voice.”

She liked his voice it was deep and soothing and made her feel all kinds of things.

“I want you to think back to the first time you had to deal with someone. The first time you remember having to hurt someone. Can you do that?”

She nodded and soon she was retrieving the memory. It was one she had shoved deep into the dark recesses of her mind.

“When I count to three and snap my fingers you are going to be back at that day, ok?”

He waited a heartbeat and then, “One...two...three.” He snapped his fingers.

“What do you see?”

She latched onto his voice as the memory took over.

_Felicity looked down at the body at her feet. He had been the rat in the organization and she had dealt with him accordingly. She looked down at him with cold disdain, but somewhere deep inside where the darkness was trying to stretch its fingers was a small sliver of remorse. Remorse was not something that was even in the organization’s vocabulary. She had learned that from a young age. It was something only the weak could feel, and everyone knew she was far from weak._

Felicity continued to tell him about that day and despite how horrific the story was that was unfolding Oliver kept his composure. What she was telling him was not necessarily a surprise but seeing the pain on her face was. She was starting to grow agitated as the memories overwhelmed her and he knew he needed to get her back to reality.

“Ok Felicity listen to me. I am going to count to three and when I snap my fingers I want you to wake up, ok? One……. two……three….”

She gasped as Oliver snapped his fingers, the memories fleeing her mind like rats scurrying from the light. He had taken her back to that dark place inside of her and she wanted to scream. She opened her eyes and looked at him, the pain shining brightly in her blue eyes.

Oliver leaned forward and placed his hand on hers. “It’s ok Felicity. You are ok.”

“Why did you do that? Why did you want me to remember that?”

“Because I wanted you to remember that it was not your choice to be in this life. But it is your choice to continue to stay in it.”

Felicity’s body was trembling as it did each time when she had a hand in the violence and a tear slipped down her cheek.

“You were born into this Felicity and you felt it was your duty to take over when your parents passed.”

She looked up at him swiftly, “How did you know that?”

“I can see it in your face.”

She looked away not wanting him to see that he had touched a nerve.

“Felicity you are going to marry a man, not because you love him, but because it will benefit both your families.”

“I know!” It came out a little more forceful than what she expected but right at this point her emotions were raw and he was pushing further. Why?

“I want you to tell me what YOU want Felicity.”

“I don’t know.”

“You came here for a reason. I saw the pain in your face when you were remembering. Do you want to continue to live in that pain?”

She could not speak, as tears were clogging her throat. She just shook her head no.

“What do you want?”

The pain was overwhelming, and he knew he had pushed her just enough. “What do you want Felicity?”

“I want out!” She screamed the words as her tears started to fall. “I want out.”

Oliver stood and approached her, and he placed a hand on her arm. She did not pull away as sobs wracked her body. She was too spent.

“Then I will help you get out.”

She looked up at him with watery eyes and when she saw the strength and assurance in his, her hope blossomed just a little bit more.

***

Oliver left work that day with her on his mind again. He was not sure why thoughts of her seemed to linger. He had never had a patient do that before. He pulled out his phone and as he slipped into his car he dialed Tommy’s number.

“Wow, twice in one-week Queen. I am flattered.”

“Hey Tommy, do you have a minute?”

“Sure, what’s up?”

“I have a patient that might need SCVI’s help.” SCVI stood for Star City Violence Initiative. It was an organization that Tommy had started once his club had become successful. It helped those in need to escape from violence whether that was domestic, gangs or even the mob. Oliver had worked with them on occasion when he had a patient who was in an abusive relationship.

“What’s going on?”

“I can’t say too much right now. But I wanted to keep you on alert.”

“Can you at least tell me what kind of violence.?”

“The mob.”

“Shit Oliver you need to tread lightly. I don’t want to one day turn on the news and find you are missing.”

“Don’t worry about me Tommy. Just keep your phone near you. I am not sure how quickly I might need your help, but I am hoping soon.”

Tommy agreed, and Oliver hung up with a sigh. He drove home slowly trying not to think about her and when he got home he decided the best way to do that was go for a jog. Oliver pulled on his sweatpants, tennis shoes and a t-shirt and then strapping his phone to his arm he put in his earbuds. Soon he was running along the street, the rhythm easing the tension that had taken root in his shoulders.

He decided to run his usual route and as his muscles warmed and the tension eased away his run became cathartic. Running was something he had started when his PTSD had been at it’s worst. Now it was something that helped to keep it at bay.

He was surprised that Felicity had not yet asked him about his own PTSD. Most people did. Maybe it was just a matter of time. It wasn’t a story that he liked to tell but if he could help someone dealing with the illness than it was worth the pain of reliving it every time he told the story.

He pushed on regulating his breathing, the evening air quite cool. His feet pounded the ground as he rounded a corner heading toward the restaurant district. It was a path he had taken many times before but as he ran he saw something, or rather someone that made him slow down and then stop. He saw her.

***

Felicity had arrived home that afternoon and as usual Slade was waiting on her. She was really getting tired of that. He had reminded her that they were having dinner with the head of the Mancini family tonight at Little Italy. Felicity really did not want to go but after sending the message the day before she knew it was a must.

Albert Mancini had reached out to talk to her about a truce and Slade had slithered his way into being invited as well. This meant they would have to act like a semi-happy engaged couple and the thought made her skin crawl.

She put on the dress she had chosen for the evening, going with a black dress that left her shoulders bare and hugged her curves down to her knees. It was a modest dress by most standards with a small slit at the front of her left thigh. She liked to pair it with a pair of black pumps and deciding to wear her glasses she left her hair down to brush her shoulders.

It gave her a look of femininity but made her feel confident and when she met Slade in the lobby she didn’t spare him a glance. John helped her with her coat and they were out the door. John had been against her engagement with Slade from the start and was not above throwing a glare his way whenever he was in his vicinity. He helped Felicity into the car and then walked away as Slade neared. There was no way he was going to be Slade’s door man.

The silence in the car was deafening but it was just how Felicity wanted it and soon they were gliding up to the curb of the restaurant. She was grateful to be getting out of the car and away from Slade for a moment and as she stepped out and released John’s hand she looked up and right into the eyes of Dr. Oliver Queen.

He seemed to be on a jog and had stopped at the end of the block when he saw her. She looked stunning and Oliver let his eyes roam over her as they stared at one another. He was sweaty and catching his breath, but Felicity had to admit he looked good. It was the first time they were seeing each other in a casual setting and Felicity turned as Slade walked up next to her. She wanted to go talk to him, but Slade was watching her carefully, so she lowered her eyes and took the arm that Slade offered to her. Her eyes stayed on Oliver as Slade walked her to the restaurant door and she noticed Oliver’s hands fist at his sides.

Oliver was not expecting to run into her here. This was a route he ran regularly and seeing her with him had punched him in the gut. The thought of her having to pretend to be engaged was eating at Oliver and again he wondered why she was having such an affect on him. She was a patient. He had to remember that.

John had noticed the look between them and as Oliver slowly approached to pass John stopped him.

“Sir, what is your name?”

Oliver stopped when a mountain blocked his path. The man was all muscle dressed in a nice trench coat. Oliver looked up into a face that surprisingly had warm brown eyes and he decided to answer.

“Dr. Oliver Queen.”

John nodded. He had a feeling that Oliver was the doctor, but he had not seen him or met him.

“John Diggle, I am Ms. Cutler’s bodyguard and driver.”

Oliver relaxed and looked at him with interest. “Very nice to meet you John.”

“I just wanted to have a word with you. I saw the way you were looking at her, and the way you were looking at Slade.”

“Slade?”

“Slade Wilson, her fiancé.”

The way John said the word fiancé caught Oliver’s attention. That one word told him that John was not any happier about the fake engagement then he was.

“I personally detest the man and I pray for the day that this engagement is called off. I am hoping you will be able to talk her into that.”

Oliver felt the same way, but it was not his choice to make. “I can’t make anyone do something they don’t want to do. That has to be Felicity’s choice.”

John stepped closer and Oliver could see the concern in his eyes. “He does not have her best interest at heart and if Felicity does not end things he is going to hurt her.”

Oliver’s eyes narrowed. Was John trying to tell him something? Their eyes met, and Oliver felt that he and John came to an understanding.

“I can see you care about her Dr. Queen. So do I.”

Oliver looked toward the restaurant where she had disappeared and then back at John. “I will do my best John.”

John nodded and then stepped back, their conversation decidedly over. Oliver walked a few feet and then started running again. Now his mind swarmed with thoughts of her and Slade.

John said that Slade was going to hurt her. Oliver needed to make sure that never happened.

***

Felicity pasted on a smile as their dinner continued. Mr. Mancini had brought his wife with him and so their conversation had been lighter than if he had been by himself. Slade had placed his hand at Felicity’s back when they walked to the table and Felicity had hurried her steps so his hand would fall away. She looked back at him with a look that said do not touch me again before she had turned and greeted their dinner companions.

She felt the dinner went well, but her mind kept wandering to Oliver. She was thankful that Slade had not noticed the look that she had exchanged with him. She wanted Oliver as far from Slade’s radar as possible.

She didn’t know when she would be able to make her next appointment, but she found she was looking forward to it. She heaved an inner sigh of relief as she heard the dinner winding down. She was ready to go home.

“Ms. Cutler. Thank you again for meeting with me today. I think this is a good start to our families working together.”

Slade spoke before Felicity could respond, “We look forward to working with you Mr. Mancini.”

Felicity hated when he talked for her and she gave the Mancini’s a cold smile. “As long as the terms are met I believe we can co-exist Mr. Mancini.”

They stood and shook hands and as they exited the restaurant Slade tried to place a hand on her back again. He had drunk a few whiskey’s and she knew when he did that he tended to get handsy. She scooted out of his grasp but when they neared the car he grabbed her around the waist and pressed up against her back.

“Slade let me go.”

Felicity kept her voice low, so no one would overhear her, but he could hear her loud and clear. John quickly stepped up and gripped Slade’s shoulder tight.

“You have two seconds to get your hands off of her Mr. Wilson before I break them.”

Slade turned and looked at John with a sneer and that allowed Felicity time to slip into the car. John closed the door behind her and stood between Slade and the door.

“I think you should take a cab Mr. Wilson.”

John’s tone was hard and his look deadly and even with the liquor that he had drunk Slade knew better than to mess with John.

He stepped back away from the curb and John kept his eyes on him as he rounded the car and slipped into the driver’s seat. John pulled from the curb and peeked at Felicity.

“How was the dinner with Mancini?”

Felicity looked up at him through the rear view mirror and smiled, “I think he got our message. They have agreed to keep their men away from our shipments.”

John nodded, “Good.”

Silence filled the car as they drove the rest of the way home and when they pulled into the gate and up to the door John hurried around and helped her out before escorting her inside.

“I will make sure you get to your room.” Felicity knew John was offering to make sure that Slade kept his distance and she led him up the stairs and down the hall to her door. They stopped outside of it and she leaned up and kissed John on the cheek.

“Thank you, John.”

He gave her a smile and then she slipped inside. He stayed until he heard her locks turn and then he made his way to his room, happy to know she was safe. He would always keep her safe. Even if it meant his own life.


	4. Chapter 4

Felicity sat at the head of the table as her men surrounded her for a meeting regarding a shipment that was due to come in that afternoon. The guns that were being received that day were some of the newest on the market; the firing power alone was newsworthy. She had instructed her men to be on high alert. Despite the fact they were now working in a more civilized fashion with the Mancini family there had been rumors that another family in town was trying to flex their muscle. Felicity had not been able to get a name, so they needed to be on high alert.

The men all stood to leave as Felicity thanked them. One of her guards stayed behind and she gave him a curious look.

“Something on your mind Jensen?”

“May I have a moment of your time Ms. Smoak?”

“Sure.” She watched as Jensen closed the door to the room and then nervously approached her.

“Ms. Smoak, may I speak candidly?”

“Absolutely Jensen.” She gave him a puzzled expression. She could tell something was on his mind and he was nervous about bringing it up.

“The men have been talking, and there is some rumors going around that Slade will be taking over as head of the family after the wedding. The men are loyal to you Ms. Smoak and they are concerned about Mr. Wilson.”

Felicity felt her cheeks turn red with anger. Had Slade been running his mouth?

She stood and approached him and placed a hand on his shoulder. “I assure you Jenson that even after the wedding I will still be the head of this family.” She looked into his eyes and when he saw the conviction there he nodded.

“Thank you, Ms. Smoak.”

“Jensen you go tell the men that I am not going anywhere. They still report to me, is that understood?”

He gave a brief smile and it went away as quickly as it had appeared. “Yes Ms. Smoak.”

He gave her a brief nod before he turned and walked out of the room. Felicity was fuming. Slade had been pressuring her to give him more responsibility over the last few weeks. Now she wondered if he was trying to undermine her to her men.

She gathered her things and made her way purposefully to her office. It was time she and Slade had a long talk. She summonsed him to her office and when he arrived she asked him to close the door. Little did he know that two of her most trusted men, one being John, were going to be standing outside the door.

“What can I do for you love?”

Felicity visibly cringed. She detested when he called her that. “Please, have a seat Slade.”

He looked at her with a frown. “Is something wrong?”

Felicity had to hold in her anger. She wanted to handle this with as little confrontation as possible, but she would find that was not possible. She slowly took the ring he had given her for public appearances out of her pocket. “I am calling off the engagement.”

Slade looked at her in shock. “What? Why?”

“Because I no longer feel a merge of our two families would be beneficial for us.” She gave him a calm look. She had been thinking about this long before she started seeing Dr. Queen but seeing and talking to him had helped her to make up her mind.

Slade grew angry, “Don’t be stupid Felicity. This merger is exactly what our families need. Our families coming together will further solidify the Cutler family's place as the top family in Star City and will further strengthen my family’s holdings.”

Felicity shook her head no. “You don’t understand Slade. I don’t want to marry you. You have been trying to take over the family since the day we worked out the merger. You undermine me to my men as well as in front of our enemies. I cannot and will not tolerate that.”

Slade’s eyes narrowed. “Have you met someone else?”

Felicity’s anger flared. “Not that it is any of your business but no, I have not.”

“You are going to regret this Felicity. Everyone knows you need a man to keep this family strong. You need someone who can make hard decisions and do what is necessary to expand your territory.”

Now that made her angrier. “Someone who will make the tough decisions?” She stood up in a fury. “I make tough decisions every single day. I was forced to kill my first informant at the age of 17 in preparation for taking over this family. I have done whatever is necessary, including torturing men to keep this family on top.” She gave him a look of disgust. “Your prehistoric notions of men needing to run this family are ridiculous Slade, and my men know it.”

Slade took a step closer but stopped when he heard a door open behind him. “Are you in need of our services Ms. Smoak?” John spoke up from behind Slade. Slade clenched his fists.

“We are not done with this discussion Felicity.”

“We are more than done Slade.” She looked at John. “John, please escort Slade to his room so he can pack his things.” She looked back at Slade. “He is moving out today.”

Slade looked at her cold stare and he stepped forward and sneered, “You will regret this.”

John stepped up behind him and Slade pulled back and then turned and stalked out the door with John and another guard hot on his trail. Felicity’s hands were shaking as she picked up the phone and dialed Oliver’s number.

“Dr. Queen please. Tell him it is Felicity Smoak.”

“Dr. Queen is off today. Would you like to speak to his colleague Dr. Morrison?”

“Um, no, thank you.” Felicity hung up the phone feeling a little disappointed. She really needed to talk to someone. She grabbed her phone and raced upstairs and seeing his card sitting on her side table she dialed his cell number.

“Dr. Oliver Queen.”

“Dr. Queen?”

“Felicity?”

“Can I come see you? I know you are off today, but I don’t know who else to turn to and I really need to talk.”

Oliver paused as he heard the desperation in her voice. Something had urged him to give her his cell number. He couldn’t turn her away.

“Would you feel comfortable coming to my apartment?”

Felicity spoke without hesitation. “Yes, that would be fine.”

Oliver gave her his address and she grabbed a pen and paper and wrote it down.

“Thank you, Dr. Queen. I will see you there.”

“Felicity?”

There was a pause and then she heard him say, “Call me Oliver.”

She quietly hung up the phone and took a steadying breath. She was not upset about breaking up with Slade. In fact, that had been a long time coming. It was having to bring up her first kill. It had shaken her to her core at the time and the memory still did.

She went into the bathroom to freshen her make-up. She didn’t know why she cared about what she looked like. The man was her doctor for Christ sake. But she did care, and she re-applied her lipstick before she looked at herself with a critical eye.

She was pale, her blue eyes seeming large against her skin. There were still dark circles under her eyes. She knew that was from lack of sleep. She rarely slept through the night. She finally turned away, no longer able to look at herself.

Grabbing her phone and her purse she walked downstairs and summoned John.

“How are things going with Slade?” She asked the question not because she cared but because she wanted him out as quickly as possible.

“I left Rick and David to handle him. He should be gone shortly.”

“Good. I need you to drive me somewhere.”

John followed her as she walked to the door and outside to the car. “May I ask where?”

“To Dr. Queen’s apartment.”

John nodded with a knowing look in his eye. She had broken things off with Slade and he could not be happier, and now she wanted to go see Dr. Queen. The man obviously cared about her, even if he did not know it yet.

John opened the door and gave her a soft smile. “Gladly Miss Smoak.”

He closed the door behind her and then walked around and slid into the driver’s seat. He heard the partition roll down between them and he looked at her through the rear-view mirror. He knew what she wanted to ask. Was she doing the right thing? Had she done the right thing? Should she trust Oliver?

“He is a good man Felicity.” John looked at her and then back at the road.

“How do you know?” He heard the tremble in her voice.

“Because I looked into his eyes Felicity.” He gave her one more look before he turned his attention back to the road and Felicity slid the partition back into place.

***

Oliver walked downstairs from his bedroom with his mind still on the fact that Felicity Cutler was coming to his home. He could not believe that he had asked her to come to his home. _God, what was he thinking?_ He wasn’t thinking, that was the problem. When he heard her voice, the vulnerability there it had sliced through his chest like a knife.

He paused at the bottom of the stairs and ran his hands through his hair. This was becoming so much more complicated. She was his patient. However, he was feeling things for her he should not be feeling.

He heard the doorbell ring and blowing out a steadying breath he walked over and opened the door. She looked up at him with her haunted blue eyes and he knew, right at that moment. He was lost.

“Hi Felicity. Come in.” He stepped back from the door to allow her to enter and then closed it softly behind her. He watched as she walked in and looked around almost curiously. It was not an opulent apartment by any means, and not up to her standards. But it suited his needs just fine and was decorated to be warm and inviting. The view from the balcony was the selling point and he found himself spending many a night out there overlooking the city.

“Can I get you something to drink?” He motioned toward the kitchen as she turned to him a little uncertainly.

“Do you have any wine?”

“Uh, wine? Of course. Is red ok?” He walked to the kitchen and started taking down two glasses.

“Red is my favorite. Thank you.”

She walked over to the couch and sat down as her eyes looked around his apartment. She found she liked it a lot. It suited him.

He walked toward her a few minutes later with the bottle and two glasses and she watched as he poured them each a glass before she lifted hers to her lips. It was delicious.

“You have good taste in wine.” She gave her glass an appreciate look. She was still nervous, and he could tell by how she was making small talk.

“Thank you.” He set his glass on the coffee table and then sat back on the sofa placing his arm along the back. “So, what is going on? You sounded upset when you called.”

“I broke things off with Slade Wilson.”

Oliver looked at her in surprise while he tried to control the relief that bubbled in his chest. “I’m sorry.”

She took a sip of her wine and shook her head, “OH don’t be sorry. I am not upset about that. In fact, that has needed to happen for a while now. I knew he was trying to undermine me with my men and that coupled with the fact he is a grade A ass, were two things that convinced me it had to end.”

Oliver tried to hide the smile that was threatening to spread across his lips. “So, what is bothering you?”

She shifted uncomfortably and then set her glass on the table. “While Slade and I were arguing a memory was brought up that I have been trying hard to forget.”

He saw her hands start to shake. It seemed to be something that happened to her when she was really upset. He reached over and laid his hand on top of hers. It seemed to quiet her anxiety.

“Talk to me Felicity.”

“I know we have talked some about things I have had to do in my position.” She stood up and his hand fell away. They both felt the loss. She walked over and looked out the window. He noticed she did that when talking to him and he realized that it was a way for her to tell him something without seeing his reaction. They would discuss that later.

“When I was 17 years old my father came to my room. It was the middle of the afternoon and I was doing some homework. He sat down on my bed and told me that there was something he needed me to do. He said it was something that would prove to our men that I was fit to take over the family someday.” She tensed. “I wasn’t sure what it was, but I went with him. He was my father. I trusted him.”

She started to shake, and she had to clear her throat before she continued. “He took me down to the basement, which was a surprise because he hardly ever let me in the basement. That is where the men trained and where enemies were housed for interrogation.”

Oliver stood up, his full attention on her.

“He took me to the cell of a man by the name of Antonio Mardel. He had been captured by my father’s men several days before trying to gather intel for the Mancini family. When we walked in the man looked at me with hatred so intense it took me by surprise. I had never had anyone look at me like that before. It was eye opening for me. Someone hated me before even meeting me. I felt awful. But things were going to get worse.”

Oliver walked up beside her and stood facing her. He could see she was lost in the memory, her pain squeezing at his chest.

“My father handed me a knife. He talked to Antonio letting him know that he would die if he did not tell my father what information he had relayed to the Mancini’s. The man refused.” Felicity swallowed. “My father proceeded to cut him, and he made me watch. He wanted me to know that there were places you could cut a man to extract maximum pain with little blood.” She shivered. “I had never heard a man scream like that ever in my life.”

Oliver sucked in a breath as she continued. “This continued for over an hour. My father would ask him to tell him. Antonio would refuse, and my father would cut him. He screamed every time. Toward the end the man was obviously not going to talk. So, my father killed him. He slit his throat.” She finally turned and looked at him with dead eyes. “I ran out and threw up. All the blood, the smell, his screams. It was too much.”

“God Felicity, I am so very sorry.”

She gave him a mocking smile. “That was not the worst of it. The next day my father took me back downstairs. A man had been working with Antonio and my father wanted me to repeat the process from the day before. He wanted me to cut him and then kill him. So that is exactly what I did.”

The look on Oliver’s face was too much for Felicity to take. She lowered her eyes and then walked back over to the couch and sat down taking a huge sip of her wine.

Oliver let out a breath before he walked over and sat down next to her. “You feel betrayed on several levels. You trusted your father. You loved him. That ended for you in that instance Felicity. The day your father asked you to kill that man was the day you felt truly and utterly alone.”

She looked at him because he was right. “Did you know that I didn’t even shed a tear when my parents were murdered?”

Oliver placed a hand on hers again and she was glad for the warmth that he generated. “My mother stood by while my father had me kill a man and I hated her for that.”

Oliver took her hand and held it and she clung to his touch like a lifeline. “Felicity, I know you cannot see it right now. But you are strongest woman I have ever met. Most people would have let that experience turn them into a monster. Yet you have been carrying that burden for years and here you are trying to escape.”

She pulled her hands away and scoffed as she stood up. “I am not strong. I am a coward. Oliver, I killed that man with no question, no hesitation. I have continued that life……”

Oliver stood up and grabbed her by the shoulders, so she would look at him, “Felicity. Having strength is knowing when something is not working and making a change despite everything. This has been the only life you have known, and you are wanting to leave it behind. That takes strength.”

Felicity looked up into his eyes and saw the sincerity in the brilliant blue depths. They both became aware of his hands on her shoulders and he lowered them, taking a step back. He placed his hands in his pockets.

“I am sorry Felicity, I should not have touched you.”

She looked at him with tear filled eyes, “I miss being touched.” It was the softest of whispers, but Oliver heard it. He heard it and his mind and body reacted. He pulled her to him and held her.

She felt his strong arms go around her and she could not control her response to him. He was her doctor, but she did not care. At that moment he was a man giving her comfort, and she wrapped her arms around his waist and held on tight.

Oliver’s hand went up and gently cradled her head as she shook against him. John had given her a hug here and there over the years but this, this was different. Oliver's body was warm and hard and his arms engulfed her. She reveled in it. _God, she had missed being held by a man_. She had only been with one man in her life. He had been a teenage boyfriend that had introduced her to sex. Their couplings had been frenzied and lustful as they both explored their bodies. But then he had moved.

After that her father had started grooming her to take over the family and none of the men in her father’s house would come near her. Other men stayed away as well. They could not handle that she was a strong independent woman. Her life had become lonely.

Oliver felt her arms tighten around his waist and he could not let go. He knew he should. He had gone too far as it was. But he was drawn to her and for the life of him he could not let go.

Felicity turned her face into his shirt, inhaling his scent. He smelled of cinnamon, citrus, leather and patchouli and it was making her head spin. Her body was leaning into him as she pulled back and slid her arms up around his neck. Oliver looked down at her and his hand strayed to her cheek.

They stared at each other, as the feeling of being lost and alone suddenly started to fade away. Oliver saw the yearning in her eyes and he knew she was vulnerable. He needed to step away, but before he could she leaned up on her tiptoes and brushed her lips over his with a kiss that made his stomach swoop.

_Holy shit he was in trouble._


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My Muse has been a little off the last couple of days but I am getting back on track. I hope you guys enjoy this update.

Oliver pulled her closer for a moment, his instinct to deepen the kiss and see where it took them. However, his practical side took over. He was her therapist. He slowly pulled away and looked down at her beautiful face, her eyes closed, her lips parted and swollen pink from their kiss. He cupped her face with his hands again and then stepped back.

“Felicity. We can’t.” His voice was soft and tender.

She slowly opened her eyes and looked up at hm and he saw the desire that resided there before her eyes shuttered and realization hit her. He was right.

She moved her hands from his neck, sliding them down the front of his chest before she let them fall to her sides. Oliver stroked her cheek before he stepped away and a slight awkwardness built between them.

Felicity felt embarrassment flood her face and she turned away. Being in his arms had felt so good, so right and now he was pulling away.

“Felicity……” Oliver reached a hand out toward her, but she moved away.

“I think I should go.” She grabbed her purse to walk to the door, but Oliver moved quickly in front of her to stop her.

“Please don’t go. Not like this.”

She kept her eyes down still embarrassed. “I just kissed you. I am sorry. I don’t know what came over me.”

Oliver gently tilted her chin up so that she was looking at him. “Felicity. I am not sorry that you kissed me. In fact, I didn’t want to stop. But I am your therapist. I will not take advantage of you.”

Felicity saw something in his eyes that eased her fears. He wasn’t rejecting her. She saw the concern and desire in his eyes that he was trying hard to fight.

Oliver let his hands slide to her upper arms and gently stroked them. “Felicity you still have so much more that you need to deal with. I don’t think right now is a good time for us to go down this path.” She knew he was right. There was something between them, they both had felt it. But right now, was not the time to explore those feelings.

Oliver gave her a soft smile. “However, I reserve the right to change that in the future.”

She smiled up at him and seeing her smile was like a beam of light. “I will hold you to that.”

Oliver nodded and then placed his hands on his hips. “Felicity, I am concerned about Slade.” After his talk with John he was worried that Slade might try to hurt Felicity.

“I can handle Slade. He is the least of my….” As she was about to finish her statement her phone buzzed. Felicity looked down and said, “Well speak of the devil.”

Oliver tensed. “Is that Slade?”

“No, it is John, but he is saying that Slade is looking for me. I have to go.” She placed her phone back in her purse and then looked at him, her feelings for him were changing and evolving. Maybe it was better to have some time to think about that.

Oliver took her hands in his, “Felicity please be careful. I don’t trust Slade and neither does John.”

Felicity squeezed his hands and reluctantly let them go. “I will talk to you soon.” She walked out the door and as it closed behind her Oliver cursed.

“Dammit.” He ran his fingers through his hair as he sat down on the couch. How could he have let his personal feelings about her change? She was his patient. But each time he saw her all he wanted to do was take her in his arms and comfort her. Their kiss had shaken him, but it had been amazing. Oliver finally stood and grabbed his keys. For once he was finding that he needed to talk to someone.

***

Felicity walked down to the car and John helped her inside before he slipped around to the driver’s seat. He lowered the partition as he pulled away from the curb.

“What is the situation with Slade?”

“He has been calling around asking the men where you are, and James was the one who called me.”

“James doesn’t know, right?” Felicity frowned. The thought of Slade finding out about Oliver terrified her for only one reason. She knew that Slade would not hesitate to use Oliver against her and she was not going to let that happen.

“I told the men that you were taking a spa day.” John’s lips twitched. He knew how she felt about spas.

Felicity smiled, “Well at least we know Slade would not set foot in one of those places.”

John nodded, and they spent the rest of the ride in silence. She would tell him about her visit later.

***

Tommy was watching sports on TV when he heard a knocking on his front door. It was persistent, and he paused the television, throwing out an “I’m coming!” as he walked to the door. He opened it and Oliver strode into the room.

“I kissed my patient.”

Tommy closed the door behind him and looked at him confused. “You did what?”

“I kissed one of my patients.”

Tommy knew what that could cost Oliver. “What the hell were you thinking man?”

“I wasn’t, that is the problem.”

“At least tell me she is beautiful.” Leave it to Tommy to ask that question. He knew Tommy was trying to lighten things because he knew just how serious this was to Oliver.

“She is unbelievably beautiful Tommy, but that does not excuse my behavior.”

“Did she slap you?” Maybe she had not returned his kiss.

Oliver let out a huff of a laugh, “No. She actually kissed me first.”

Tommy looked at him with wide eyes. “Ok.”

“But the problem is I kissed her back.” Oliver looked at Tommy and ran his hands over his face.

“Is she married?”

“No.”

“Do you think she will tell someone?”

Oliver shook his head. The only person she might possibly tell was John and something told him he could trust him.

“Well then I would try to calm down. It was one kiss. Just don’t let it happen again.”

Oliver heard what he said, and it sounded so simple. But something deep inside told him it would not be that simple. Things with Felicity would never be that simple.

“You want a beer?” Tommy walked to the kitchen and opened the fridge. He pulled out two beers and popped the lids before he walked over and handed one to Oliver. He looked at Oliver’s face and took a drink of his beer.

“Shit dude, you have it bad.”

“No, I don’t.” Oliver took a drink and walked to the couch.

“Ohhh yes you do my friend. You should see your face. This woman has really gotten to you.” Tommy sat down next to him amazed. He had never seen Oliver affected by a woman like he was by this one.

Oliver took another swig.

“You can deny it all you want man, but I know you. I have known you for a while. You are in so deep that you can’t see the surface.”

Oliver sighed because Tommy was right. He saw right through him and if Oliver was not careful then others would see it too.

***

Slade paced in an alley, his mind not quite able to handle the fact that Felicity had broken off their engagement. He had not had the guts to tell his family just yet. He was hoping he could get her to change her mind. Something had changed in her in the past couple of weeks and he was determined to figure out just what that was.

He was waiting to talk to one of her men. He was an enforcer that Slade had found to be quite informative. The man did not like working for a woman and he was determined to work with Slade to change that.

Niko walked into the alley as Slade paced and when he saw him, Slade approached him. “What did you find out?”

“Nothing yet. John does not tell the men about where he takes Ms. Smoak

“Then you need to try harder.” Slade grabbed the guy by the shirt. “You do whatever you have to do to find out what she is up to. I want an answer and I want it soon.”

Niko nodded. The look in Slade’s eyes scared him slightly but he was determined to help him. The family needed to be run by a man.

Slade let him go and then stalked off. He pulled out his phone and tried to call Felicity, but she would not answer. It went straight to her voicemail. He needed to figure out a way to get her alone. By getting her alone he could talk to her and convince her to take him back.

Slade dialed a local florist and ordered a dozen roses. He knew that Felicity had not been with anyone in awhile so maybe he should try to go the romantic route. It was hard for a woman in her position to meet someone, let alone date them. He prayed his idea would work.

***

Felicity looked down at her phone. Slade had tried calling her three times that day. She ignored every single call. He was the last person she wanted to talk to because right now she had more pressing matters to deal with and it was late.

Felicity had a shipment coming in that needed to be signed off on by her personally. It was a shipment of microchips that had been developed by a tech company she had been working with for the past year.

No one except John knew of her love for computers and electronics and so very few of her men were involved in the shipment. Felicity, John and two of her most trusted men arrived at the docks around midnight. The ship had just arrived and as a box of the cargo was being unloaded they approached the dock.

The ship’s Captain was a Russian native that had worked several deals for her father. He smiled when she walked up.

“Мисс Катлер, вы прекрасно выглядите этим вечером. (Ms. Cutler, you are looking lovely this evening.)” 

“Спасибо, Алекси, я рада тебя видеть. Как прошло путешествие? (Thank you, Alexi, it is good to see you. How was the journey?)” 

“Мы были благословлены светлым морем. Ваш груз должен быть в целости и сохранности. (We were blessed with fair seas. Your cargo should be intact.)” 

Felicity nodded and then motioned for her men to check the box. They opened it and looked inside and then turned to her indicating everything was as it should be. Felicity moved closer to Alexi.

“Спасибо за ваше усмотрение. Я верю, что это будет продолжаться. Вы были верны моему отцу, поэтому я ожидаю такой же верности. (Thank you for your discretion. You were loyal to my father and I expect the same loyalty.)” 

She gave him a cold look that left no doubt of what would happen if he told anyone. He nodded knowing exactly what she was saying. 

“Вы всегда будете иметь мою преданность и осмотрительность, мисс Катлер. (You will always have my loyalty and discretion Ms. Cutler.)” 

Felicity nodded and instructed her men to stay and supervise the unloading of the cargo. John walked her to the car and drove her home.

It was after midnight and she was exhausted but happy that the shipment had arrived and there had been no trouble. She wanted to keep the microchips secret for now. John bid her goodnight as she walked to her room and she entered and locked the door behind her. Stripping off her clothes she pulled on her pajamas and glanced at her phone as she walked to the bed. She wondered what Oliver was doing and before she could talk herself out of it she texted him. 

_F: Are you awake?_

_O: Hi, yes, is everything ok?_

_F: Yes. I am fine. I just wanted to talk to you before I went to bed._

_O: To me or to Dr. Queen? ::smiley face emoji::_

Felicity smiled. 

_F: To you._

Oliver settled back against the headboard of his bed. He wondered for a moment if she was in bed as well. His mind started to imagine her lying there and he had to clear his thoughts. 

_O: How was the rest of your afternoon?_  
  
_F: Busy. But I got some important business done._

_O: Anything you want to talk about?_

_F: Not today. But maybe soon._

_O: Any word from Slade?_

_F: He tried calling me several times, but I ignored his calls._

_O: Just watch your back and keep John with you at all times._

Felicity felt a warmth in her belly. 

_F: If I didn’t know better I would think you cared._

There was a pause and Felicity bit her bottom lip as she waited for him to respond. When he finally did, and she read his answer, that warmth spread throughout her body. 

_O: I do._

_F: I think I am going to make another appointment for tomorrow._

_O: Are you sure that is a good idea?_

_F: I am tired of doing things for others Oliver. I am going to start doing what I want to do, and this is what I want to do._

_O: Well then, I will tell my assistant to work you in when you call._

_F: Thank you. Goodnight Oliver._

_O: Good night Felicity. Sweet dreams._

Felicity hung up the phone with a smile and she laid down feeling happy for the first time in a long time. Those microchips were a big step toward her independence from the mob and she closed her eyes falling quickly to sleep. She dreamed that night of the life she envisioned for herself and Oliver was there. 

Her sliver of hope grew bigger. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short update but things should start evening out for me personally and I will get back to longer updates. I hope you enjoy this one.

Felicity woke the next morning having slept better than she had in a long time. She was finding that the more she talked to Oliver and told him of her life and her past that the nightmares were becoming fewer and far between. She could not remember the last time she had slept without dreaming about one of the many men she had killed in the last few years. It was something that tore at her soul and caused her dreams to be black and hopeless.

She dressed quickly and made her way down to her office. She had some paperwork to finish up this morning and then she was hoping to get a chance to see Oliver.

She walked into her office and a frown curved her brow when she saw a bouquet of flowers sitting on her desk. John was outside of her door as usual and she called for him.

“John. When were these delivered?”

John stepped into the room. “This morning.”

Felicity approached the bouquet. They were quite beautiful, a fall mix of oranges, greens and purples. She took the card and opened it and when she saw the signature she immediately tore it up. John noticed the look on her face and moved closer.

“Is everything ok Felicity?”

“Yes. John can you please take these flowers and return them to Mr. Wilson with a stern warning not to contact me again?”

John nodded, “What did the card say?”

She looked at him and bit out, “Meet me for dinner tonight. Slade.”

John grabbed the vase and stalked to the door. “I will put Andrew on detail until I return.”

Felicity nodded at him and walked to her seat behind her desk as he left. She sat down with a sigh and then started to go through the pile of paperwork she had been putting off for days.

The fact that Slade thought she would meet him for dinner really annoyed her. She had made it perfectly clear to him that their fake relationship was done, but he obviously did not get the message. Maybe John would have to make it a little clearer.

She reached for her phone and called Dr. Queen’s office making an appointment to see him that afternoon. She felt her heart skip a beat and a little flip in her stomach as she thought about being held in his arms, his firm lips on hers. She finally shook her head to clear her thoughts. She needed to just put that in the back of her mind for now and focus on her work.

She started reading and signing the papers and soon she was lost in her work.

***

Oliver finished up with his third client and sat at his desk filling out his notes from the session. He looked at his calendar and could not help but smile when he saw her name listed for that afternoon. He thought back over the kiss he had shared with Felicity and as his body warmed he had to try to think of something else. He needed to focus on helping her to get out of the mob and move away from that life, so today he had a plan.

He needed to know everything. He needed her to tell him the worst of the worst. He knew it was going to be hard on her, but it was the only way she could clear her mind.

Oliver made a few more notes and then closed the file he had been working on, pushing it across his desk. He pulled Felicity’s file close to him and looked inside reading the notes that he had made about the first man she had killed. It was so hard for him to fathom her killing anyone, but he knew it was a part of the life she had been born into. That didn’t scare him, in fact he respected her more because she did what she had to do to survive. She was strong, and he admired her for that.

He sat back as he thought back over his own life. He had killed before and the ghosts still haunted him. He had been young, fresh out of high school and looking for something, anything to make his life worthwhile. Growing up the way he had took its toll on him at a young age. He had partied to the point where the police knew him personally and he had a different woman every night. It was during that time that he had happened upon a recruiting center.

He had hit rock bottom the night before, spending the night in jail for a public intoxication charge. His father had let him sit in jail to think about his behavior and for the first time in his life he did. The recruiter had seen something in him when he entered the room that day. After signing papers and going through a physical he had been sent home to pack. The next day, after saying goodbye to his family, he had left, and that day had changed his life forever.

Oliver shook his head of his memories trying to focus on his plan for Felicity. She would be there soon, and he needed to have a clear head if he wanted to help her. Wallowing in his own demons would not help her at all.

His assistant buzzed a few minutes later and then Felicity was walking through the door. She had on her usual sunglasses, her hair swept back into a ponytail. She had on a sleeveless grey dress that hugged her curves and high heeled pumps that did wonderful things to her legs and Oliver took a deep breath and then smiled at her. As soon as the door closed behind them he stepped closer.

“Hi.”

She smiled at him, “Hi.”

“How was your morning?” His eyes looked her over, devouring every inch of her. She looked beautiful.

“Slade sent me flowers.” She set her purse down and removed her sunglasses placing them in her purse. Oliver tensed beside her upon hearing Slade’s name. “He wanted me to meet him for dinner tonight. I proceeded to have John return the flowers to him with a message to leave me alone.”

Oliver’s tension eased just a little. She walked over and sat down on the couch crossing her legs and Oliver took his seat across from her. He cleared his throat and looked at her pulling his glasses from his shirt pocket.

“How did hearing from him make you feel?”

She looked at him, surprised he would ask her that. “Angry, frustrated. I want him to just leave me alone.”

Oliver started writing notes and when Felicity saw this she realized he had slipped into doctor mode.

“Do you think John got his message across?”

“Oh yes. When he came back he informed me that Slade had been “convinced” to not send flowers or try to contact me again.”

Oliver lifted an eyebrow. “Convinced. Is that another word for violence was used?”

Felicity didn’t meet his eyes and so he made a few more notes and then he set his pad aside. “So today I want to get a little more into the things you have done over the years.”

Felicity stiffened, and he saw her expressive eyes shutter.

“You have told me about your first kill. Why don’t you tell me about your last one?” Oliver shifted in his seat. He really did not want to know the answer to this question, but it was important for her to move forward. They sat in silence as Oliver waited for her to speak, and she finally did hesitantly.

“He was a traitor. He had been hanging around the docks trying to steal intel about our shipments.”

Oliver watched her face. She was remembering.

“When was this?”

Felicity looked him in the eye and there was little emotion in the expression on her face. “Last week.”

Oliver gave her a curious look. “How did you feel during that moment?”

“How did I feel? Sick to my stomach, like a monster, dead inside.” Her answer came out quickly and Oliver could tell it was exactly how she felt about herself during those situations. He could see her withdrawing into herself. “He begged. Some beg, some cry and some just curse.” Oliver swallowed as her words hit him. They were so cold, so unfeeling.

“Some men wet themselves when they feel the pain of the first cut. It is excruciating and meant to incapacitate. The second cut though is the one that first makes them bleed. When they see their own blood and feel the pain, that is when their situation usually hits them.” She looked off lost in her thoughts. “By the time you are done cutting them, they have screamed until they no longer have a voice and all that is left for you to do is kill them.”

Oliver could feel his own anxiety building as she continued to speak, and he took a deep breath to calm himself down. He had killed, and he had tortured and the way she spoke so coldly about it was making him relive some of that.

She looked at him in that moment and his face was white as a sheet. _God, he must be so disgusted with her_. She had just talked about torturing and killing someone like she was sharing the local news. Oliver finally got his thoughts under control, using a technique he had learned to calm his nerves. She was looking at him with a sad, scared expression. He had to reassure her.

He leaned forward and took her hands in his. “It’s ok Felicity. I told you before there is no judgement here.”

“You must think I am a monster.” Her hands lay in his limply as if she was surprised he was touching her.

“I could never think of you as a monster Felicity. We all do things in our life that we never in a million years ever imagined we would do.”

She looked at him and realized he was speaking from experience. _What had he done in his past?_

“I want to give you an exercise. Tonight, when you get home I want you to sit down and write down the names of every single person you have killed for your family. If you don’t remember some that is ok. Then I want you to take those names and burn them.”

“Burn them?”

“Yes. I want you to see their names disappear and when you do I want you to let the guilt you feel go. You were brought into this at a young age and groomed to be a part of this lifestyle. You need to think better of yourself.”

Felicity felt his hands tighten over hers and she finally gripped him back. There was so much she did not know about him and his past. She moved closer to him and gripped his hands meeting his eyes and the next questions she asked shook him to his core.

“What about you Oliver? What demons are you running from?”


	7. Chapter 7

What demons was he running from? That was a loaded question and it made him immediately stiffen. He had never shared his life with anyone except for Tommy and the thought of telling her made him nervous. He knew that she would not judge him, based on her own life, but having to talk about it made him anxious.

“We are not talking about me Felicity. This is about you.” He hoped he didn’t sound defensive and he cleared his throat and finally met her eyes.

“You gave me my homework. What else do you want from me?” She sounded drained, but he knew he needed to push her just a little further.

“I want you to tell me the worst of the worst. You told me about your first kill and your last. I need you to talk about the worst thing you have ever done. That one thing that you keep locked in the back of your mind because if you think about it, it will eat you alive.”

She looked at him a little unsure. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“You have to talk about it. You have to share that burden.”

She stood, her body rigid and wrapped her arms around her waist as she walked to his window. “I can’t.”

Oliver stayed seated letting her have her distance. “What is the worst thing that can happen if you tell me?”

Her voice became a whisper. “The ghosts will destroy me.”

“Ghosts are not real Felicity.” His voice was just as soft but reassuring.

“No, they are not real but the hold they have on me is very real.”

Oliver could tell from how she spoke that this was something so unspeakable that it coupled with her life was the cause of her PTSD. He needed her to talk.

“Felicity what eats at you?”

“Oliver, please, I am begging you. Leave this alone.”

“Felicity listen to me. If you don’t want to tell the whole story right now then tell me something, anything.” _Please talk to me_ , he thought.

“What do you want me to say?” Anger tinged her voice now and he sat back feeling better. Anger was better than no feeling at all. “That day is something that I will never get over.”

“Where were you?”

“At the docks. We had just gotten in a shipment of ammunition.”

“Were you alone?”

“No. John and some of my men were there. I needed to be there to accept the shipment per our agreement with the distributor.”

Oliver tried to navigate slowly. He was afraid if he pushed her too fast she would stop talking and getting her to open up again would be near impossible.

“Was the shipment damaged?”

“No everything was there; all eight crates were accounted for.” She was still looking outside and not at him. She seemed almost lost in her mind. “There was also another larger container. It was not supposed to be on the ship.”

Ok, Oliver could work with that. “Can you tell me what was in the crate?”

Felicity started to shake. “No.”

“Ok, let’s move on to something else. What was John doing?”

“John was walking the dock with my men.”

“Keep talking Felicity what do you see happening?”

_Felicity was soon lost in her memory. She remembered checking the crates to ensure that the merchandise was correct. This had been a shipment that her father had authorized the day before he was killed and the fact that the head of the family had to accept it puzzled her. She thanked the Captain and was about to leave when she noticed a large shipping container sitting to the back of the pier._

_“What is that?”_

_The Captain looked at the container and then at her. “That is the special shipment your Father authorized.” He handed her a key to the lock._

_“Special shipment.” She looked at him confused. “What would my Father be authorizing?”_

_The Captain looked a little nervous. “I am not at liberty to say. I must be going.”_

_He turned and walked back to the ship and Felicity approached the container. “John! Can you please have our men open this?”_

_John looked at it curiously and cautiously. “Do you know what it is?”_

_Felicity shook her head, “He just told me that it was something my Father authorized to be delivered.”_

_John called the men over and took the key that Felicity held out to him. They each drew their guns as one of the men approached and unlocked the crate. When Felicity saw what was inside her legs almost gave out…._

She stopped talking and Oliver watched her carefully. “What did you see Felicity? What was in that crate?”

A sob stuck in her throat and she placed her hand over her mouth. “I can’t….”

By this point she was shaking, and Oliver decided to stop. He could not help himself and he stood and walked to her placing his hands on her arms.

“It’s ok Felicity. I am here.”

She quickly turned and buried her face in his chest and his arms closed around her. He felt her body shaking and he tightened his hold. This memory was almost more than she could take. He felt her wrap her arms around his waist and then her sobs started. He felt his shirt growing wet as her tears fell and so he just held her, letting her emotions escape. He knew this was only the beginning. As she worked through everything her emotions were going to flood out of her.

Felicity held onto him tightly, her memories of that day still so vivid it was like a fresh wound. Her tears started to subside as he held her and soon she was taking a deep breath and breathing him in. His scent seemed to calm her and soon her tears were dry. He was fast becoming her safe place, her anchor.

Oliver could feel her calming down and he knew he needed to let her go, but he could not get his arms to move. Holding her felt good and it felt right. He decided to be a little selfish and hold her just a little longer.

“I’m sorry Oliver.” Her voice came out sounding small and hoarse, the tears still clogging her throat.

“Never apologize to me Felicity.” He tightened his hold on her.

She felt him tighten his arms and she pulled back sniffling. She didn’t want to put him in a position where he felt compromised and so she decided to pull away. Oliver let her go reluctantly and she walked over and took a Kleenex to wipe her face.

“That is obviously your most painful memory. You will talk about it when you are ready.”

She looked at him with watery eyes. “I told you more today than I have ever told anyone.”

His voice softened, “It’s a good start.”

She let out a breath and then walked over to the couch. “I should be going.”

He didn’t want her to leave, he wanted her to stay but he knew she was right. She gathered her things and as she approached the door he walked over to her.

“Felicity?”

She turned as he stopped in front of her and the drained expression on her face almost broke him. “If you need someone tonight before you go to bed. Will you please call me?”

She gently cupped his cheek with her hand and gave him a small smile before she turned and walked out.

Oliver watched her go and when he shut the door he leaned back against it with a big release of breath. That had been intense.

Little did he know that it was only the tip of the iceberg.

***

John watched Felicity walk out of the building and even though he could not see her eyes he could tell she was drained. He needed to get her home and let her rest. However, as she approached a voice called out and John and Felicity both tensed.

“Felicity!”

Felicity turned to see Slade striding up and he glanced at the building she had just walked out of before he looked at her. John moved closer and slightly in front of her and Slade was smart enough to stop a few feet away.

“Felicity, can we talk?”

“No. John please take me home.”

“Felicity wait, please.”

Neither John nor Felicity listened, and John helped her into the back seat before he glared at Slade and then walked around to climb inside. He pulled away and then lowered the partition.

“He followed you today.” It was a statement and Felicity sighed. “What do you want to do about it?”

She was so emotionally drained that she did not want to deal with Slade right now. “Can we talk about this later John?”

He heard the weariness of her voice and he nodded. They would discuss it when she had gotten some rest. He drove her straight home and followed her up the stairs and to her room. Her steps seemed heavy and labored and when he heard the door lock behind her he walked downstairs. He sent one of his men up to guard her door and then he walked out.

He was going to see Oliver.

***

Slade watched the car drive off and then looked at the building behind him with a shrewd gaze. He saw her walk out of that building. What was she doing there? He decided to do a little research and find out what was in that building. Maybe it was something that could help him in his quest to win back her hand.

He stalked over to his car and gave the building one more look before he drove away.

He had some research to do.


	8. Chapter 8

John walked into Oliver’s office and nodded to the girl at the desk inside. She let him know that Oliver was just finishing up for the day, so she asked him to take a seat and then went to tell him that John was there. John did not sit down. He walked around the room with a restless pace as he noted the articles framed along the wall. Oliver had been celebrated many times for his work with service men and women fighting PTSD. John wondered about his story, but he knew that could wait. Right now, their focus needed to be on Slade Wilson.

The door behind him opened and John turned to see the young woman shutting down her computer and grabbing her purse. “You can go in now Mr. Diggle.”

She gave him a warm smile and then walked out the front door locking it behind her. John made his way into Oliver’s office, his eyes scanning the room. It was a simple room and John thought it comfortable. He saw the certificates on the wall that showed his education and then finally he looked at Oliver. He was just finishing up some notes and then he closed the folder and looked at John.

Oliver stood and John noted his worried expression. “John, I wasn’t expecting you. Is Felicity ok?”

John nodded and motioned for him to sit down, “She is fine, but we need to talk.”

Oliver sat back down, and John took the seat across from him and leaned his arms on his knees. “I came to talk about Slade.”

Oliver’s eyes hardened. _God just hearing that name made him angry_. “What did Slade do?”

“Well it’s not what he has done, it is what he will do if we don’t stop him. He followed us to your building earlier today and the confronted Felicity out front. Now luckily he only saw the building and still does not know she is seeing you.”

“I can handle Slade.”

John gave him a measured look. Something in his gut told him that Oliver could more than handle Slade.

“It’s not you that I am worried about. Slade will not hesitate to use Felicity’s “therapy” as a sign of weakness and he will exploit that with her men.”

“Are Felicity’s men not loyal to her? Why would they even believe him?”

“Because that is a part of this business. It’s a man’s world and Felicity is the first woman to step this far into it. Her men love and trust her, but if a man were to challenge her it could turn ugly.”

Oliver didn’t know what to say. He clenched his fists, his jaw ticking.

John narrowed his eyes. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

John sat back in his seat and steepled his fingers in front of him. “What branch of the military were you in?”

Oliver looked at him in surprise, “How did you know I was ex-military?”

“You work with service men and women suffering from PTSD and I can tell by the way you handle yourself. When I approached you the other day you were tense, waiting to see if I was a threat.”

“That doesn’t mean I was in the service……”

“Oliver. Being ex-military myself I can recognize a fellow soldier.”

Oliver looked at John and realized he couldn’t lie to him. If they were going to work together against Slade, he needed to honest with him.

“I was recruited for the US Navy DEVGRU, SEAL Team 6 when I was 19.”

John lifted an eyebrow. He was very impressed. “That team is highly classified. Why did you leave?”

Oliver shifted in his seat, his jaw set, “I would rather not say. Now what are we going to do about Slade?”

He needed to get the subject back on track. John was cutting way to close for Oliver’s comfort. He already felt like he had told him too much. John looked at him a moment longer and then nodded. That was fair. He could tell Oliver did not want to talk about it and he respected that.

“I think it is time that you and Felicity went public.”

Oliver looked at him in shock. “What? You just said that if Slade found out about her sessions that he could use it against her.”

“I am talking about your personal relationship.”

Oliver was a little unsettled. How did John know so much? “We don’t have a personal relationship. I am her therapist. That is all.”

“Come on man, I’m not stupid. I can see how much you care about her.”

“I am her therapist John, that is it.” His tone was hard, but John just ignored it.

“Ok, your relationship is not personal. But we need to pretend that it is. If you and Felicity go public with whatever you both choose to call it then Slade will not have anything to hold over her.”

“What about the fact that I am a therapist.”

John smirked, “Won’t matter. We emphasize that you guys are dating, it won’t matter what your occupation. Therapist’s don’t date their patients, right?” John lifted an eyebrow.

Oliver cleared his throat as his nerves started up, “No. They don’t.” He looked at John. “How does Felicity feel about this?”

“I wanted to get you on board before I approached her. She will be easy to convince.”

“What makes you think so?”

John smirked again, “I have eyes man. And even though I have only seen you two within 30 feet of each other the tension between you two is palpable.” He grew serious. “I have been with Felicity for a long time Oliver. I know her better than anyone. As much as she might not want to admit it, she cares about you, and I know you care about her too.”

Oliver sighed and ran a hand through his hair. How was this going to affect her therapy? He needed to figure that out. But for now, he needed to help John neutralize Slade before Felicity got hurt or worse.

“Ok. So how do we do this?”

“Felicity or I will be in touch.” John stood and walked over to his desk and Oliver stood as he approached and held out his hand. “You are a good man Oliver.”

They shook hands both having come to a full understanding. John turned and walked out, and Oliver slumped back down into his chair. It had been hard enough at her session today trying to keep his hands off her.

How was it going to work with them pretending to be a couple?

***

Felicity closed her eyes as the warm water and bubbles started to relax her muscles. She cleared her mind trying not to think about Slade. She knew they needed to do something about Slade, and it was getting to the point where she wondered if they should just make him disappear. That option was tempting, but she also knew it would anger the Wilson family. They had to tread lightly.

She cleared her mind of those thoughts and Oliver took over. The way he had kissed her still made her insides warm. The way he held her was something that she longed to feel again. The loneliness of being the head of the Cutler family was stifling. She had been dreaming of getting out one day and she even had the person she wanted to replace her. However, being Noah Cutler’s daughter came with more baggage then anyone could imagine and just walking away was not an option. That option got you killed.

She stayed in the tub until the bubbles disappeared and the water was tepid before she finally got out. Drying off she pulled her on pajamas and was brushing her hair when there was a knock at her door. She set down her brush and walked to the door, knowing who it was before she opened the door. John was the only person allowed to disturb her evenings and she frowned at him when she opened the door.

“John, is everything?”

“Yes, may I come in?”

She opened the door wider and allowed him to walk through before shutting it behind him. This was the one place where they could both talk freely. Her room was sound proof and they had talked late into the evening some nights as her thoughts of leaving the family had flourished.

“I just got back from seeing Oliver.”

Felicity looked at him in surprise as she slowly sat down on the couch. “What? Why did you go see him?”

“We need to deal with Slade Felicity.”

She sighed, “I know we do. But I want to leave Oliver out of this.”

John spoke softly. “We can’t. Slade is already suspicious and you and I both know it is only a matter of time before he finds him.”

Her eyes darkened as anger flooded, “I won’t let Slade hurt him John. I will kill him before I let him do that.”

John tried to calm her down, “I know you would. But I think there is a way to handle this without it getting to that.”

She looked at him in surprise, “How?”

“I think you and Oliver need to take your relationship public.”

Felicity lost her breath. “What? We…we don’t have a relationship John. He is my therapist.”

John smiled, shaking his head as he looked down and then back up at her. “Oliver said the same thing.”

Felicity felt butterflies in her stomach at the mention of being in a relationship with Oliver. She remembered their kiss but then also that Oliver had pulled back and told her now was not the time.

“We need Slade to think you two are in a relationship so that we can throw him off. He is too close Felicity. If you and Oliver go public and say that you are dating, then he won’t have anything to hold over you.”

“I can’t….”

“Why Felicity?” John approached her and sat down next to her. “You care about him and he cares about you.”

“I can’t bring him into this world John.” Her eyes looked up at him haunted. “He’s too good. He had me tell him about the worst thing I have ever done, and I couldn’t even tell him everything. The thought of tainting him or what he thinks of me is too much.”

John sighed. “You told him about the day at the docks.” He looked at her with conviction, “Felicity that was not your fault. That was your Father.”

“Yes John, it was my Father. That day showed me just how evil and unfeeling he could be. But I didn’t stop it John. I let it happen, and now I live the same life he did.”

“Felicity you didn’t have a choice. You had not idea that your Father had been smuggling women and children and even if you did you could not have stopped it. The family would have had you killed. You had to prove yourself to take your place in the family.”

“But their faces. God John, when we opened that crate and those women and children looked out at me terrified. I should have done something. Those women and kids were being sent to what accounts to slavery. Every day I must live with that. I let that happen and sometimes the weight is almost too much to bear. I should have helped them but instead I walked away.” The last two words were bit out in complete self-loathing.

“Felicity, you walked away because you had no choice.” The fact that her Father had done something so despicable and so wrong had eaten away at her long enough. Maybe Oliver would be the one to help her see that. “Not to mention you stopped the shipments. Authorities were notified after the fact. You did all that you could.

“Did I? You keep saying that I had no choice. There is always a choice John. I was just too weak to see that.” She sighed. “Oliver will think I am a monster. I can’t expose him to this life, not like that.”

“I think he would surprise you Felicity.”

“No, I can’t.” She stood her jaw firm. She wouldn’t drag him into her world.

John stood and softly said, “He is already involved Felicity. He became involved the day his feelings for you changed. Plus, he has already agreed.”

She turned and looked at him and she could see he was serious. He placed his hands on her arms and looked her in the eye. “He can take care of himself Felicity. Just trust him.”

John kissed her forehead. “We will talk more about this tomorrow. Why don’t you think it over and get some rest?”

He turned and walked out, and Felicity locked the door behind him and then leaned against it. Could they do this? Could they pretend to be in a relationship? It was hard enough trying to keep things platonic now, how much harder would that be if they were pretending to be a couple? Nearly impossible.

Felicity walked over and grabbed her phone and then setting it to “private” to ensure no one could trace the call she dialed his number.

Oliver had just pulled on his sweats, his chest bare and his hair damp from a shower. He had not been able to get Felicity off his mind since his talk with John. When he picked up his phone and saw it was her calling, he quickly answered.

“Hey.”

“Hey.” They both spoke softly.

Oliver sat down on his bed and leaned back against his headboard. “Am I to assume that John talked to you?”

Felicity smiled slightly and sat down her bed. “You would assume correctly.”

“And?”

“And, I told him no.”

Oliver frowned, “Why?”

Felicity closed her eyes as she leaned back against her own headboard. “I can’t bring you into this world Oliver. I won’t.”

“Felicity. I am already there.” His hand clenched the phone. “The day you walked into my office changed everything for me. I care about you and if this will help to take care of Slade then I am going to do it.”

“Oliver, please. You don’t understand……if I told you everything. You would hate me.”

“I could never hate you Felicity.”

She opened her eyes, her chest aching. She wanted to tell him everything. To bare her soul to him and let him see her deepest, darkest places. But she just could not get the words out.

“Felicity, you can say all that you want but you are not going to change my mind.”

They sat in silence for a moment and then he said, “Besides who else would put up with me?”

A smile started to tip the corners of her mouth at just how stubborn he sounded. She should have known.

“So how are we going to do this?” She spoke softly and he could hear the smile in her voice. He relaxed against his bed, happy to hear the acceptance in her voice.

“Well we could go to dinner. Like on a date.” He grinned.

“You mean like a date date?”

“Yes, like a date date.” She pretended to consider for a moment.

Oliver sat back enjoying just hearing her voice. “So, Ms. Smoak, what is the most popular restaurant in Star City? I mean something that paparazzi would be all over?”

She laughed, “Oh that is easy, Rafael’s.”

“Ok, would you like to go to dinner with me tomorrow night at Rafael’s?”

She smiled, her stomach flip flopping as if she was a school girl. It was the first time she had ever felt this way and it lightened her mood instantly.

“I would love to Dr. Queen.”

“You can call me Oliver.” They both laughed and she played with her comforter as something struck her.

“Oliver? How will this affect my therapy?”

Oliver knew that question would arise, and it was something he himself had been thinking about since John had left his office.

“Well the good news is that you will have an excuse for coming to my office, so I don’t see it changing things at all.”

That made her feel better. “We just need to keep the patient side of things confidential.”

“Oliver will you make me a promise?”

“Anything.”

“If things get to be too much for you or….”

“Felicity, don’t even finish that sentence.”

She quieted.

“We can talk more tomorrow. Get some rest.”

“Good night Oliver.”

She hung up the phone and as much as her stomach was churning with dread there was a sliver of excitement that she could not contain.

Tomorrow the world would know that Dr. Oliver Queen and Felicity Smoak were dating.


	9. Chapter 9

Oliver looked in the mirror at his slacks, dress shirt, coat and tie. He removed the coat several times as his nerves were on edge. Tonight, he was going to dinner with Felicity and their “relationship” would become public. He had tried to think of any other way that they could get rid of Slade and nothing had come to mind. John had been right. If Slade thought they were dating, he had nothing to hold over her head.

He finally decided to wear the coat without the tie and he grabbed his keys and wallet and headed to his car. He was meeting Felicity at her house and then they were riding together to the restaurant. His nerves were in full swing, but he knew once they were together, he would calm down. He wasn’t nervous about being in the public eye or of Slade finding out his connection to Felicity. He was nervous about seeing her. He was nervous about having to “act” like they were a couple.

Act was a funny word, because there would be no acting involved where his feelings for her were concerned. He just hoped that when the time came for them to go back to their normal lives and “break up” that he could do that.

He pulled up to the gate and gave his name and as the huge iron gate swung open, he looked curiously at the house before him. He had heard of it of course. Everyone had heard of Cutler Manor. Exterior pictures had appeared here and there over the years in tabloid magazines, but no one had ever been invited inside. Rumors were rampant that if you entered the house you never left alive.

He walked up the steps and took a deep breath before he pushed the doorbell and it was only a moment before an impeccably dressed maid answered the door.

“Welcome Dr. Queen. Ms. Felicity is expecting you. She will be down shortly.” She smiled warmly at him and then led him to the sitting room. Oliver looked around curiously as he entered the house and walked with her down the hall. The home was austere and intimidating. The foyer was large with a beautiful stairwell that led up each side of the room and met at the top. There was a beautiful chandlier that hung from the ceiling and minimal art work. The floors were marble and pristine and when he walked into the sitting room, he felt his nerves return.

The house screamed money but somehow it did not seem to fit Felicity and he realized that she lived here, but it was not her home. The sitting area held two crème colored couches with a glass and chrome coffee table and a huge fireplace. There two chairs and a small table on the back wall that also housed book shelves.

Oliver turned as he heard someone approach and his breath left his lungs when he saw Felicity. She looked exquisite in a soft peach dress that had a halter top, a tight waist and then flowed around her knees. It showed the lines of her neck to perfection and the heels she had on enhanced her gorgeous legs. She had left her hair down which he loved, and her blue eyes were looking right at him.

He saw her hesitate at the door when he turned and then she smiled at him. He approached her slowly and stopped in front of her with a smile curving his lips.

“You look beautiful.”

“So do you. Well I mean handsome, you look handsome.” Her voice was a little breathless and he took her hand and kissed the back of her knuckles.

“Are you ready to let the world see us together?” Oliver teased and held out his arm and she laughed lightly.

“Most definitely.” She placed her hand on this arm and they walked to the front door. John was waiting and he gave a nod to Oliver before leading them out to the waiting car. John held the door for them both as they slipped inside and then he walked around to the driver’s side and started the car. He made sure to leave the partition up as he drove giving them their privacy.

Oliver’s eyes kept shifting to Felicity as they drove to the restaurant. She looked so beautiful that it was hard to take his eyes off her of her. He noticed that she seemed to be looking at him too and he finally could not help himself. Oliver reached over and took her hand. She looked down as their fingers entwined and neither could deny just how right it felt.

John pulled up in front of the restaurant and Oliver felt Felicity’s fingers tighten around his own. He squeezed back, letting her know they were in this together. John made sure that it was leaked that Felicity would be at the restaurant that night and the paparazzi had responded. They were lined up outside the entrance and John stoically held open the car door as Oliver slid out and stood. He held his hand down to her and gave her a reassuring smile and she slipped out of the car and stood right next to him.

He leaned down to whisper in her ear and the intimate moment made the cameras go crazy.

“You ready for this?” His breath against her ear made her shiver and she looked up at him and smiled. The picture of them staring at each other as if no one else was around would make the front page.

“Absolutely.”

Oliver pulled her protectively close and led her into the restaurant and when the owner saw her arrive, he escorted them to a secluded table personally. Oliver held out her chair and then moved to his own.

“I think I am blinded from all of the flashes going off.” Felicity widened her eyes and Oliver laughed.

They each ordered a glass of wine and after they had ordered their food Oliver reached over and took her hand, holding it on the table.

“We have to make this look real, right?”

She smiled softly and glanced around. “Have you eaten here before?”

“No, but I have been wanting to try this place.” He glanced around and then looked back at her. “Did I tell you that you look beautiful?”

Felicity laughed, “Yes. But thank you for telling me again.” Felicity looked at him curiously. “So, there is a question I have been dying to ask you.”

“Go right ahead.” Oliver settled into his seat, but his hand never left hers.

“How is it that a guy like you, so handsome and smart and handsome….is still single?”

Oliver knew this conversation would come up at some point. “I dated someone off and on for a couple of years, but finally realized that we just did not work together. We wanted completely different things in life. I was in the service before that, so serious relationships were not realistic.”

Felicity’s looked at him in surprise. “Wow, two years is a long time.”

Oliver shrugged. “Yes, but when you break up three times during that time it shortens it.” He took a sip of his wine and looked at her over his glass. “I am guessing that being a mob princess makes meeting men difficult.”

Felicity’s face grew serious and he realized he had hit a nerve. “You could say that. The men that were bold enough to approach me were either controlling or just wanted power. Anyone else was too scared and just kept their distance.”

“But you did have one relationship.”

She nodded and sipped her wine. “When I was in high school. He broke things off with me when he went to college. He said he didn’t want to limit his choices.”

Oliver’s jaw tightened. What an ass. “I am sorry Felicity.”

She shrugged. “It’s ok.” Oliver could tell that it really was and so he relaxed.

“Can I ask how the deal with Slade came about?” Oliver really was curious to know. The man was obviously not her type.

“Before my father died, he set up the arrangement. After Cooper broke up with me, he started to instill in me the importance of marrying for power. Slade’s family is not as strong out the Cutler family but have some profitable territory. It was either him or the Cantoni family and the only option with them was a 60-year-old.”

He could tell she was trying to joke but the look on her face told him everything. She had done what she did to please her father and no other reason. It was a classic case of wanting her father’s love. Oliver squeezed her hand gently.

“Your father didn’t care that Slade was not a “nice” guy?”

“No. He made the deal simply for the territory.”

Their food was soon delivered and quiet descended as they ate. The food was delicious. They found themselves sharing their plates and just enjoying themselves. They were unaware that someone was watching from across the room and reporting to Slade.

Felicity sat back with a satisfied sigh as their plates were taken away. “That was wonderful.”

“Well then we will have to come back here.”

They continued to sip their wine and just enjoy their evening when suddenly they were approached by a reporter.

“Ms. Smoak. Can you tell us the name of your companion?”

“Have you two been dating long?”

“Are things serious?”

“What happened to your engagement to Slade Wilson?”

The questions came at a fast pace before the restaurant manager could corral them out the door. However, Felicity made sure to answer the few questions that she could, in hopes that word of their relationship would spread.

Oliver finally called for the waiter and took care of the ticket, before he walked around and helped her up from her seat. They walked out toward the car and as the flashes went off around them Oliver did something completely unexpected. He turned her in his arms, and he kissed her.

He didn’t know what took hold of him or why he did it but neither complained as Felicity placed her arms around his neck and kissed him boldly in return. John finally cleared his throat after a few minutes passed and they reluctantly parted. They looked at each other, their eyes not hiding their feelings, before Felicity slipped into the car. Oliver quickly moved in behind her and John shut the door before getting into the driver’s seat and pulling away from the curb.

Felicity’s lips were still tingling from their kiss and they both tried to ignore the awareness of one another that was pulsing between them. That kiss had been Oliver staking a claim for the whole world to see and Felicity would be lying if she said it didn’t thrill her. Just to have someone else be in control for a moment had been so freeing.

She glanced over at him and noting the partition was up she slid her hand over and slipped it into Oliver’s. He looked at her in quick surprise before he relaxed.

“I enjoyed that.” Her voice was soft, but her eyes were blazing as they looked at him.

“So did I.” His hand tugged her closer and she slid across the seat.

He watched her eyes drift down to his lips and he became still. He was afraid if he kissed her again, he would not stop. Felicity however knew exactly what she wanted, and she leaned up and kissed the corner of his mouth. He closed his eyes as a satisfying sigh escaped and then her lips were tasting him.

He tried to keep his hands to his sides as she placed her hand along his jaw and deepened the kiss. _God this was harder than he thought it would be._ He wanted nothing more than to grab her and pull her onto his lap, but this was not real. Or was it?

Felicity stopped kissing him and placed her hand on the intercom, but her eyes did not leave Oliver’s.

“John will you drive us down by the river and then around to the house? Slowly.”

Oliver’s eyes were caught in hers and he barely heard John respond in an affirmative before she was straddling his lap. His breath quickened as she settled on him and then she had her hands in his hair and was kissing him as if he was the oxygen she needed to breath.

His hands clenched before they finally ended up in her hair as well.

Felicity moaned, neither of them able to stop the momentum. Their kiss went from passionate exploration to downright heated and neither could avoid the inevitable.


	10. Chapter 10

Oliver pulled back, their breathing heavy as they both looked at each other in wonder. Neither one could get over how they reacted to each other. Oliver wanted to pull her back and kiss her some more, but not in the back seat of the car. John was just a partition away and as much as he knew things were more than likely sound-proof, the thought made him uncomfortable.

“Felicity….” His hands held her hips and she stared at him still panting. “I don’t want our first time to be in the back seat of a car.”

She looked around remembering where they were, and she climbed off his lap and self-consciously smoothed her skirt.

“I……yes, you are right. I am sorry.” She fidgeted and Oliver grabbed her hands.

“Felicity look at me.” She finally met his gaze and he smiled.

“Why don’t you tell John to go back to your house. If that is ok.” He gave her a tentative look, wondering if maybe the mood had been broken. She kept her eyes on his as she reached over and hit the intercom button.

“John. Please take us home.”

She heard John’s response and then Oliver leaned over and kissed her softly again. She let her hand linger on his jaw as he pulled away. Neither one said another word as John drove them back to her house. Her nerves were starting to set in a little, but she knew that they could not deny their attraction. Every time they touched it was like sparks of electricity danced through her body and the way he looked at her set her pulse to racing.

Oliver watched her as they drove to her house. Was this the right time? Maybe they should wait. There were so many thoughts rolling through his head. The attraction was undeniable, but the thought of rushing into something…

John pulled up in front of the house and then opened the car door with his usual stoic expression. If he had any thoughts about his boss and Oliver, he was not one to voice them. They were both adults and he could tell they cared about one another. Felicity had been alone for so long that John was happy she finally had someone she could turn to.

Felicity took Oliver’s hand and led him into the house and as he glanced around, she walked right to the stairs. There was no use prolonging the inevitable and his heart started to hammer in his chest as they neared the top of the stairs. She led him down the hall and when they reached her room she stopped and turned to him.

“I…I’ve never had anyone in my room before.” The vulnerability on her face was surprising to him. This was her house, even if it was not her home. She should feel comfortable here. But then he remembered the story about someone trying to kill her and his defenses rose.

She turned and opened the door and when he walked inside, he was completely surprised. She shut the door quietly behind him as he looked around. The room was large, which was expected. However, what he did not expect was the colors. She had a wide array of bright colors around the room. It started on the large king size, four poster bed. The comforter was an inviting mint green with large fluffy white pillows and red and yellow accent pillows. There was an oversize picture window with a window seat and the cushion of the seat was a bright yellow. Again, she had bright blue and orange pillows strewn along it.

He looked to the left to see a large, beautiful wood burning fireplace in white marble and the couch and chairs in front of it were mint green matching her comforter. Again, there were the pillows and she even had some art on the walls to tie it all in. The room was a stark contrast to the rest of the house and Oliver found that it fit her perfectly.

She fidgeted behind him as he took everything in, and she placed her purse on a nearby table. When he turned to look at her, he smiled softly. “It suits you.”

“The house was my father’s. I hate it. But this was one room I could decorate and make my own, so I did.”

“Why don’t you sell it and move?” He thought he already knew the answer but wanted to hear it from her.

“This house is a status symbol for my family. You can’t be the largest mob family in Star City and live in an apartment near the Glades.” The smile she gave him was rueful and filled with a little sadness. Somehow, he thought that was exactly what she wanted to do.

Oliver walked closer to her and placed his hands in his pockets. She looked around wistfully. “I inherited the house of course but the family is worried that if I sell it someone could take that as a weakness within the family and try to challenge me for my position.”

Oliver tensed. The thought of Felicity having to go up against anyone dangerous made his protective instincts come to life. The solider in him would kill anyone who tried to harm her with no hesitation.

Felicity stepped closer to him. His eyes watched her with intense fascination, and she reached up and gently stroked his jaw, her fingers dancing in his scruff.

“I love this.”

Oliver closed his eyes as she dragged her fingers up and down his jawline. Her body was pressing lightly against his and it was taking everything within him not to grab her and kiss her senseless. Something was telling him to take his time, because once she saw him with no shirt, he knew the questions would come. He was not ready for them.

Felicity leaned up and placed a kiss to the mole at the corner of his mouth. She gently licked it with her tongue and then slid her lips across his and he groaned. Her hand slid up and into his hair and she deepened the kiss. Oliver let his lips open to her allowing her access and the opportunity to taste him. She whimpered and he shuddered because the sounds she was making and the feel of her lips on his were an intoxicating combination.

Felicity knew he was holding back. She could feel the tension in his body. “Touch me Oliver.”

Those words whispered so innocently, coming from her lips as they nibbled and played with his unleashed his desire. His hands lifted and gripped her head as he took control of the kiss. This time when they kissed it was all tongues and breath and hands as they realized they could no longer hold back. Felicity’s hands went straight for his shirt. She tugged it out of his pants and started to undo the buttons and he pulled back looking at her with eyes dark with desire. As she pushed the shirt off his shoulders her eyes widened in shock when she saw the scars that crisscrossed the smooth skin of his chest. She noted the star tattoo above his left pec and the Chinese symbols going down his right side. Her eyes filled with compassion as she let her fingers dance along each individual scar.

“Oliver…”

He closed his eyes not wanting to see the pity that might surely reside there. He had seen that pity many times in Laurel’s eyes and the thought of seeing it in Felicity’s made his heart ache.

His eyes flew open though as he felt her lips gently kiss his chest. He looked down in wonder as she kissed along each scar. It was so unexpected that is hands involuntarily tightened in her hair and when she pulled back and looked up at him it was not pity shining in their depths. He saw compassion, but more importantly lust.

She let her hand trail along his stomach as she moved around him and when she saw the scars on his back, she kissed them as well. He felt her arms wrap around his waist and she pressed up to his back.

“Oliver tell me what happened.”

He couldn’t deny her. As much as it hurt him to tell her, it was not something he could hide from her any longer. He reached back and pulled her around in front of him so he could see her face. Again, there was no disgust or pity, only compassion and desire.

Oliver walked over and sat on the end of the bed. Felicity could feel the tension flowing from him as he remembered. “Something you don’t know about me is I come from a wealthy family. My whole life I had been catered to and getting anything I wanted was almost as easy as snapping my fingers. My parents felt like I needed something different in my life. I was 19 and getting into trouble and I had been arrested several times. I was passing the Naval recruiting station one evening and decided to check it out. They recruited me and I ended up on Seal Team 6.”

Felicity sat down next to him.

“While we were on a mission in Hong Kong, I was captured by the target we had been sent to eliminate. My partner and I were tasked with gaining some intel for the team. We were going to raid his home the following day. However, my partner miscalculated the timing and we were caught. They killed him instantly.”

Felicity gasped and wanted to touch him, but she kept her hands in her lap He was far gone into his memory.

“They tortured me for days and deprived me of food and water. I wouldn’t speak so they finally put me in a locked room. Every day they would come and take me for my “cleansing” as they called it. This went on for two years. The man that captured me was impressed with the fact that I was so loyal and had not broken. He decided to incorporate me into his organization. Knowing that it was the only way I could survive I decided to join him.”

Oliver swallowed as the memories clogged his throat. He could still feel the sting of the whip as it sliced through the air and licked at his skin. “That is where this tattoo came from.” Oliver pointed to the star tattoo. “After I completed his “initiation” process I started working for him.” He glanced at her and then continued, gritting his teeth. “For the next three years I was his right hand. I handled the jobs he tasked me with and didn’t ask a lot of questions. I knew my team was still trying to find me but by this point I couldn’t imagine going back to them. The things I had done, that I had been asked to do, were horrific. I didn’t deserve to be saved.”

Felicity’s eyes shimmered but she stayed quiet.

“Then one day as a thank you for my loyalty he just set me free. He told me I could go home.” Oliver stood and walked over to the fireplace. “By that time, I didn’t even know what home was anymore. How could I come home to my family after the things I had done?” His fists clenched hard at his side.

“I came home but I was not the same and my family and friends could see it. I had PTSD and the episodes would hit me at such random times that I could not even hold down a job. I moved out of my family’s home in fear of hurting someone I loved. That was when I knew I needed to get some help. I started seeing a therapist for my PTSD and he convinced me to become a therapist myself.”

He turned and looked at her and went to reach for his shirt, but she stood and stopped him. “Don’t.” Her voice was tender as she looked at him. “Don’t hide from me. Please.”

She gently cupped his jaw and his eyes met hers with pain just below the surface. He leaned down and kissed her wanting to forget the memories that had surfaced. He needed to forget, even for just a moment. He started to walk her back toward the bed when suddenly there was a frantic knocking at her door.

“Felicity it’s John.”

Felicity turned and opened the door and John looked between them before his eyes met hers. “I am sorry to bother you both but Slades here.”

Felicity looked back at Oliver as he was pulling on his shirt. “What does he want?”

“He is demanding to see you. I tried to get him to leave without it escalating but he is out of control. He has some men with him.” John’s eyes looked to Oliver conveying a message that she did not understand. She raced over to her bed and pulled open the side drawer. She had one of her knives there and she placed it under her sleeve before she walked back to the door.

“Oliver stay here.”

“Like hell I am. I am going with you.” He looked at her with determination and she looked at John.

“Are they armed?”

John nodded and Felicity looked over at Oliver. “Keep your mouth shut and let me do the talking.”

She turned and made her way out of the room with Oliver close on her heels. John held out a gun in his hand to Oliver as soon as he knew that Felicity could not see them. Oliver took the gun and placed it in the back of his pants.

He could feel the tension rolling off John and suddenly he knew they needed to be prepared for anything.

***

John moved in front of Felicity as they came down the stairs and she could immediately hear Slade’s voice coming from the sitting room. He was ranting and they could not make out the words that he was saying. As soon as he saw Felicity enter the room his eyes bore into her and then they slid to Oliver.

The rage that Felicity saw fill his eyes took her back a little. In all the years she had known Slade she had never seen him angry.

“Well, well, well Felicity.” His eyes moved back to her and Oliver went still behind her his body ready to protect her at all costs.

“You have been a busy little bee since you broke things off with me.”

“What do you want Slade?” Her voice was ice cold and she let her fingers slide along the knife in her sleeve. John braced beside her and the guys behind Slade did as well.

“I want to talk.”

“She’s not talking to you.” Oliver could not help himself and the words slipped out of his mouth. Slade took a step forward and Felicity moved in front of Oliver. Slade and Oliver’s eyes stayed locked and the tension between them could be felt throughout the room.

“Slade, we have done enough talking. There is nothing more to say. Our engagement was a farce and now it is over.” Felicity tried to get his attention back to her.

“I think you need to reconsider.” Slade finally let his eyes slide back to her. “Unless your boyfriend is running the shots now.”

“Oliver has nothing to do with this, it is between you and I.” Slade stepped closer to her as she spoke, and John moved in closer as well.

“Watch your step Wilson.” His voice rang out cold but clear and Slade stopped.

“My family feels like you should change your mind. They are worried that a mob war will start if it gets out that our families are not…. uniting.”

“Is that a threat?” Felicity looked at him coldly and Oliver’s fingers fidgeted at his side. He wanted so bad to take Slade out. That was a feeling he had not felt since leaving Hong Kong and the fact it was so strong surprised him.

“It’s just a warning Felicity. Think about it.” He moved to walk out the door and he bumped shoulders with Oliver as he passed. Before anyone could blink Oliver had Slade pinned to the wall with his arm against his wind pipe. Slade’s men drew their weapons as did John and the tension in the room escalated.

“Oliver!” Felicity grabbed his arm trying to encourage him to let Slade go. “Please don’t.”

Oliver’s eyes met Slade’s with a dead calm expression and then he whispered, “You are walking a thin line Mr. Wilson. I would tread lightly.”

He glared at him and then let him go and Slade rubbed this throat, his eyes shooting daggers at Oliver.

Then he turned and walked out the door. Slade’s men followed close behind and when they were out of the house Oliver finally relaxed. Felicity launched herself into his arms and he met John’s look over Felicity’s shoulder. John gave him a nod of respect before he walked out as well.

Felicity pulled back and gently stroked his cheek and gave him a weak smile. “I thought I told you to let me talk.”

“I never was good at following orders.” Oliver gave her a playful smirk and she took his hand and pulled him toward the door and up the stairs. She knew John would make sure that security was tight and when her bedroom door closed behind them, she pushed Oliver up against it.

The adrenaline that was coursing through them both was an aphrodisiac and that combined with all the pent-up frustration and desire that they had tried to push down came spilling out. They kissed frantically as their feelings escaped them both.

There was no going back.


	11. Chapter 11

Slade was angry. He did not remember a time when he had been this angry. It was fueled by what he felt was a betrayal by her and Oliver Queen. He had come across that name when was researching the building she had been frequenting. Now he knew who she was seeing and why.

He thought back to his family and how they had reacted to his break-up with Felicity. They had threatened to demote him, and he was not having that. He got into the back seat of the car as his men jumped in the front. As they drove back to his house, he wondered about Mr. Queen. The man was a therapist. What did a mob princess see in a therapist and where did he learn that move in the living room?

Slade had a feeling there was more to Oliver Queen than meets the eye and he was going to figure it out.

***

Oliver and Felicity parted with an intake of breath. Their kiss had been all consuming, heated and if Felicity was looking for a word, downright hot. They stared at one another as they stayed in each other’s arms. Their connection was pulsing between them and both knew this was a pivotal moment in their relationship.

Oliver’s hands lifted to cup her face. He wanted her, there was no denying it. But he did not want to rush her, and he certainly did not want her to decide based on emotion. He wanted the timing to be right between them.

“Felicity. We can stop.”

She pressed closer to him and then leaned up on her tip toes and pressed her lips to his again. “Please don’t.”

She slowly started to unbutton his shirt again and he kept his hands to his side, for now. He was going to let her set the pace. She peeled the shirt off his shoulders, and he let it fall to the floor as she looked over every single scar and tattoo on his chest. Just as she had done earlier, she leaned forward and let her lips slide across his chest. She placed soft kisses to the scars, the visual scars mirroring the scars she bore inside. They were kindred souls and when she placed the softest of kisses over his heart, Oliver’s eyes closed.

She continued her exploration as she made her way around to his back. Knowing the story of how he was tortured made each one a map of his time in captivity. Her fingers were light as they worked their way along his ribs and her lips continued to map the lines and puckered skin of his back.

“You never have to hide these from me Oliver.” She walked back around and gazed up into his blue eyes. “They are a testament to the kind of man you are.”

He quickly clasped her face with his hands and kissed her deeply, her words hitting him just as deeply as they had before. He tugged on her bottom lip with his teeth as she wrapped her arms around his waist. His skin was warm to the touch, but he shivered when she scraped her nails lightly down his back.

Felicity felt waves of heat flow through her as Oliver’s hands started to remove her clothing. The feel of his lips on her skin as he kissed his way down to her neck was exquisite and she met his gaze boldly when she finally stood before him in just her lace lingerie.

There were no words spoken between them. They were finding they did not need them. The desire Felicity saw reflected in his eyes showed her that he found her beautiful. She reached down and unbuckled his belt pulling it from the loops as he toed off his shoes. The tugs sent sparks of awareness coursing through them both and when she finally had the button and zipper undone, she quickly pushed his pants down his legs.

They moved towards one another, neither one wanting to wait to feel skin on skin. Each caught their breath before their mouths met in a sensual kiss and Oliver backed her toward the bed. She felt little bolts of electricity as his hands slid down her arms and then wrapped around her back. Oliver held her as close as two people could be. Little moans slipped from her lips and when he lowered her gently to the bed, she whimpered at the distance.

His eyes were a dark, rich blue as he looked down at her and then removed his boxer briefs. Felicity moved up onto her elbows not wanting to miss a thing. She bit her bottom lip as she saw him for the first time, and she sat up and removed her bra, wanting no barriers between them.

Oliver leaned down, his voice husky. “Move back.”

Felicity scooted her body back on the bed and Oliver immediately moved up her legs, his knees bracketing her thighs. He hooked his fingers beneath the waist band of the lace and then slowly pulled it down and off her body. His breath hitched when he saw her lying before him. Her skin glistened in the light and the contrast of her nipples against her skin drew him like a moth to a flame. He leaned down and kissed each one reverently and Felicity’s hands immediately went into his hair. She gripped it with a soft tug as he lavished attention on each breast. Each lap of his tongue made her body clench in need. She arched toward him and then moaned when he moved away.

“Oliver…” Her voice whispered his name and he smiled at her.

Felicity was always in control when he saw her. Dressed to the nines and exuding a quiet power he could not describe. But seeing her splayed out on the bed, her body bare to him, begging softly, was an aphrodisiac he never knew he needed.

He took her legs and pulled her to the edge, a sexy smile on his face as he knelt in front of her. She watched with fascination as he placed each leg over his shoulders and encouraged her to open for him. It had been so long for her, and her experience was limited. But she trusted him implicitly and the look in his eyes when she opened to him was exhilarating.

Oliver kept their eyes locked at he leaned forward. The smell of her arousal hit his nostrils and he let out a growl. She giggled but the sound turned to sighs when his tongue touched her. She hit the bed arching her hips as he proceeded to work her body with his tongue. The one lover she had been with in her life, she was realizing was a selfish lover. He was only out for his own pleasure and the difference was staggering. Oliver was the exact opposite. He licked and sucked, tasting her while moans of pure pleasure filled the air and he was not going to stop until she reached her limit.

Oliver was finding her pleasurable noises arousing and his body grew hard as he continued to taste her. She was like the sweetest nectar and he was finding he could not get enough. He felt her body tensing as he continued to stroke and lick and when his tongue swirled tightly around her clit, she went off like a bomb.

Felicity cried out as she felt her body ignite. Her hands gripped his hair tightly as her body arched in one of the most amazing orgasm’s she had ever felt. Wave after wave washed over her and when her body finally started to come down, goose bumps broke out on her skin. She relaxed back on the bed, her body completely satisfied and when Oliver climbed back up and kissed her deeply, and her hands gripped the sheets.

He pulled back and looked into her passion filled eyes, her lids heavy and sated, her lips swollen from his kisses.

“You are breathtaking.” Oliver whispered the words against her lips, and he knew truer words had never been spoken. Seeing her let go like that had been amazing. She was so responsive to him and their bodies seemed made for one another.

She slid her arms around his waist as he settled between her thighs. She could feel him hard and hot against her center and being so sensitive from her release she moaned loudly when it nudged against her.

She leaned up and kissed him as she let her hands roam the plains of his back again. Her fingers danced over the hills and valleys as their tongues met and retreated, one against the other.

He kissed down to her neck again and she tilted her head to the side giving him exactly what he was seeking. He placed little bites along her skin and the feeling caused her body to start to climb towards release again. His hands slid to her hips and he held them as his body moved against her and he hissed when he felt her hand touch him. She took his cock and guided it right to her entrance and when he thrust in, they both gasped.

Her body was tight and warm and wet and everything he had imagined. He pulled back and pushed in and he felt like he was home. They started to move in a dance as old as time as they rocked against each other. The deeper and harder he thrust the more sounds escaped her lips. He captured them with his own as she let her nails slide down his back and he groaned into the kiss.

Oliver could feel the tingles along his spine as his body started the journey towards release, but he held back. He wanted to give her pleasure one more time before he sought his own. He lifted on his elbows pushing his hips down and when his pelvic bone started to rub against her clit she rocketed again. The feeling of her coming around him combined with her taste still on his lips was enough for Oliver and he pushed in hard releasing on a cry of her name.

As he shuddered above her, she held on tight and when he finally collapsed against her she held him close. This feeling of being one with someone, of joining was what she had wanted, what she was finding she needed. She did not want it to end and when he tried to move off her she buried her face in his neck and held him tight.

Oliver seemed to know what she needed, and he turned to his side, keeping their bodies joined and held her. She was shaking and he looked at her in concern, but she smiled a tender smile. “I…I have never felt anything like that in my life.”

Oliver frowned. Surely the man she had been with pleasured her, right? Felicity noted the question in his eyes, and she looked away. He took her chin with his thumb and forefinger and turned her gaze back to him.

“You told me never to hide from you Felicity. I don’t want you to hide from me either. Ever.”

She ran her finger over his chest as she explained. “I know I told you that I was only with one man. His name was Cooper and like I said, we were young. We thought we were in love and he was my first.” She gently cupped his face. “After being with you I now know what a selfish lover he was. I never had that with him.”

Oliver was still surprised. “You mean he never gave you an orgasm?”

She shook her head and her face turned red. “Pretty sad hu?”

“What a selfish prick.” Oliver pulled her as close as he could get her. “Felicity, I do not know this Cooper. But in my professional opinion he was an idiot. Seeing you unleash in the ultimate display of pleasure…” he kissed her softly…” you took my breath away.”

They kissed again and she pulled back and smiled, “Your professional opinion hu?”

Oliver smiled, “Well I do have the certificate to back it up.”

She grew serious as her fingers danced against his skin, tracing each scar over and over. Their connection was strong and Felicity was finding she wanted to know more about him. She also wanted to tell him more. The intimacy of the moment was leading her to open up. But could she? She didn’t want any secrets between them and she was finding she wanted him to know all of her, the good and the bad.

“Felicity what is on your mind? You know you can tell me anything.”

She nodded and looked back down at her finger that was still tracing his scars. “I want to tell you.”

“Then tell me.” His words were soft and tender and it was just enough. She needed to open up to him.

“You know the story I told you about the docks……the worst of the worst?”

Oliver nodded holding his breath. Her eyes turned to his and she looked at him with vulnerable trust. “It was people Oliver. The crate held people.”

Oliver gasped as his heart squeezed in pain and rage for her. He pulled her head to his shoulder as her eyes teared up and he felt her start to tremble again. He knew this time was not like the last. This time she was trembling out of heartache and pain.

The fact that she had told him was a huge step for them both. He didn’t say anything wanting to let it sink in for her that she had said it out loud to him. She had shared her deepest, darkest nightmare with him and that was enough for now.

They kissed again and he slipped out of her, both sad that their connection had to end. But he held her tight, not letting her go and soon she was asleep. She slept longer and deeper than she ever had before that night, but Oliver didn’t. He held her tight and close realizing that he was falling for her.

He was falling deep.


	12. Chapter 12

Oliver slept little that night. His mind was racing. The meeting with Slade had gotten his adrenaline pumping and he had not been that worked up since his time in Hong Kong. He saw light starting to peek over the horizon and he looked over at Felicity sleeping soundly by his side. Her soft lips were slightly parted, her lashes lay in a shadow against her porcelain skin. She was beautiful. He gently brushed the hair back from her face and then slipped out of bed.

Usually when he got this agitated, he would go run. But he did not have his running gear. All he had was his suit from the night before, so he stood at the window looking out over the gardens behind the house. He heard Felicity stirring behind him and a few seconds later a very naked Felicity was pressing against his back.

“Good Morning.” She kissed the middle of his back before moving to stand in front of him.

“Good Morning.” Oliver leaned down and kissed her softly placing his arms around her waist. Neither was embarrassed about their nakedness. As with everything between them it was easy and natural to just be themselves.

“You ok?” She looked at Oliver with concern. He seemed worried about something.

“Just feeling a little anxious.” This was the first time in a long time that Oliver’s PTSD was affecting him, and he took a deep breath, trying to use some of his techniques to stop the anxiety from getting worse.

Felicity realized for the first time just how much Slade had affected him. Felicity placed a hand on each side of his face. “Look at me Oliver.” He glanced down at her but then looked away again. “No, look at me Oliver.”

He finally met her eyes and when he saw the acceptance and tenderness there his body started to relax.

“Just focus on me.” He continued to look into her eyes as he finally started to feel normal again and he leaned down and kissed her before placing his forehead against her own. They stayed that way for several minutes and then she pulled back.

Their bodies pressed together, warm skin to warm skin hit Oliver again and he kissed her deeply. She was so soft, and he picked her up to carry her back to bed when she squealed.

“I have some meetings this morning.”

Oliver growled and then kissed her nose before setting her feet down. “Then you had better get dressed before I say screw it and keep you in bed all day.” _God that sounded heavenly._

His eyes danced with a light that had been lacking a few minutes before and she grabbed her robe and threw it on as he started to dress. “Can I see you tonight?”

“I thought you would never ask.” She smiled and glanced at her phone. “Call me later?”

Oliver slipped on his shoes and grabbed his jacket before he walked over to her. “How about I cook you some dinner?”

Felicity lifted an eyebrow, impressed. “You cook?”

He kissed her, “I guess you will have to find out.” He winked at her and then walked out of the room.

Felicity grinned as she headed to the bathroom for a shower. She had meetings today that she was not looking forward to. However, knowing she would see Oliver later made her day seem better.

***

Oliver nodded to John as he descended the stairs. He approached him and asked to speak with him alone. John led him down the hall and out the front door. As they approached Oliver’s car John stopped.

“What’s on your mind?”

“Slade.” John looked towards the house and then back at Oliver. For some reason that did not surprise him.

“He’s dangerous John.”

“I agree.” John crossed his arms over his chest. “By the way, I was impressed.”

“With what?”

“You. I have not seen that move since combat training.”

Oliver shifted on his feet. He knew he should have maintained control, but it had flown out the window when Slade had touched him.

“What are we going to do about Slade?” Oliver wanted to get off the combat subject for now. He felt that John might be someone that he could talk to about the combat, but not today.

“Do you have a gun?” John knew the answer was probably yes, but he wanted to make sure. Oliver was a soldier with PTSD. Sometimes those with PTSD stayed away from guns. However, the way Oliver had handled the gun given to him last night made John sure he had one.

“Yes.”

“Start carrying it with you and keep it loaded at all times. You are dealing with some rough people when it comes to Slade. They will follow him and do as he asked just for the simple fact that it gets them noticed within the family. Never underestimate him or those that work with him.”

“John, promise me that you will stay by Felicity’s side when I am not with her.”

John was starting to respect Oliver more and more and he was interested in finding out exactly what Oliver could do. The fact that he cared so much for Felicity made him golden in John’s book. 

“You never have to worry about that Oliver. She is the one person in this world I would give my life for.”

They met eyes and reached an understanding and John held out his hand. They shook hands.

Oliver got into his car and drove out of the gates. He had a couple of patients to see this afternoon, but his morning was free, so he decided he needed to go for a run. He needed to clear his head and running was the perfect way to do just that.

He quickly changed his clothes and strapped on his shoes when he got home. He then checked his messages, answering any questions his assistant had left for him. He glanced toward the bedroom knowing his gun was stashed underneath his bed. John had told him to keep his gun with him at all times, but there was no way in hell he was going to jog with a gun. He would have to rely on his hand to hand combat skills. The thought brought up memories of training in areas he would rather forget and he shook his head before heading out the door. He had found through the years that running helped to clear his mind. It was a way for him to work through the anxiety and focus more on working his body to exhaustion. That was exactly what he needed.

Oliver ran his usual route, going from his apartment, downtown along the main street to the industrial district. It was a scenic run for the most part as it ran along the Starling River. As he neared the industrial district where he normally turned around to head back home, he happened to notice a car following him out of the corner of his eye.

Oliver kept his pace trying not to glance over his shoulder too much. He did not want them to know that he had noticed them. The car kept pace, not far behind and when Oliver turned and ran into the alley, the car pulled up blocking the entrance. Oliver stopped and turned, and he was not surprised at all when he saw Slade and some of his goons exit the vehicle.

“Mr. Wilson. Why am I not surprised?” Oliver kept his eyes moving from man to man. He knew he needed to be on guard and not let any of them take him by surprise.

“Mr. Queen. We need to talk.”

“We have nothing to say to each other Mr. Wilson.”

“Oh, but I think we do.” Slade’s men moved closer and Oliver tensed. “You see you are getting between me and something that I have worked too long and hard to obtain. I can’t let that happen. I think we need to come to an agreement.” Olive saw Slade’s men move slightly.

“I would tell your men to back off Slade.”

Slade laughed as Oliver adjusted his stance. The men looked at Slade and laughed as well but Oliver stood still just watching.

“We can do this the easy way or the hard way Queen.”

“I guess it is the hard way. Because I am not going anywhere with you.” Oliver flexed his hands his body and mind immediately switching to defense. He had handled more men than this before. He just had hoped he would never have to use his skills again.

Slade looked at his men and then imperceptibly nodded at them. Oliver saw the movement and was ready and he dispatched of the two mean easily. He grabbed one around the neck as he kicked at the other sending him flying to the ground. Oliver used an uppercut to the face knocking the first guy to the ground as the other slowly got to his feet. Oliver threw a roundhouse kick to the face that knocked the second man out and then took the first into a choke hold rendering him unconscious.

Slade stood to the side watching with interest as Oliver turned his attention to him. He was breathing heavy and his eyes were glassy and vacant. It caused Slade to take a step back, but before Oliver could make a move on him, he pulled a gun.

Oliver stopped and watched him with fury building inside of him. This man would hurt Felicity if he was allowed to get near her. Oliver called on all his concentration and when Slade made the mistake of glancing down at his men who were starting to groan, Oliver grabbed the gun and elbowed Slade in the face. Slade staggered back, his nose bleeding and Oliver quickly dismantled the gun before throwing the pieces to the ground.

He approached Slade and when he spoke his voice had a deadly edge. “Stay away from Felicity or next time I won’t let you walk away.”

He stared into his eyes for a moment and Slade felt a sliver of fear run down his spine, before Oliver walked out of the alley and out of sight.

Slade gathered his injured men and as they all returned to the house Slade’s anger grew. Queen had embarrassed him one time too many. It was time to have him eliminated.

***

Felicity sat the head of the table of her last meeting of the day. It was with some of the heads of the mob families in Starling City. The only person that had not been invited had been Slade and that was intentional on Felicity’s part. The group had been discussing territories for the last hour and they could not seem to come to an agreement.

“Ms. Smoak, with all due respect. We feel that with the break up of you and Mr. Wilson that maybe the Bertinelli’s should take over the east side of the Glades.”

Felicity was tired of going around and round and she was just ready to get this over with. “And with all due respect Mr. Cirelli, I said no. The territory is vulnerable _because_ of Mr. Wilson. If it changes hands again that is going to send a signal that there is unrest among the families.” She looked coldly around the table. “Even I, as a woman, know that is not a good message to send.” Felicity said the “as a woman” part with sarcasm and it was not lost on the men around the table.

“My family has been handling that territory for years and we are not going to just give it away.” She looked around coldly again and the men shifted in their seats. Felicity in her glory was a sight to behold and today she was on fire.

Mr. Cirelli looked around the table and then he turned his gaze back to Felicity. “Ok Ms. Smoak. We will do things your way for now.”

Everyone stood ready to leave but Mr. Cirelli was not done. He looked at her and she could tell he was speaking for the room. “If we see that your too weak to do what needs to be done then we will have no recourse but to take the territory by force.”

Felicity walked up to him and looked him in the eye, her gaze deadly. “Don’t threaten me Mr. Cirelli.”

They stared at each other for a moment and the other men shifted uncomfortably before he backed down and they left. Felicity was furious and she wanted nothing more than to tell the men to go to hell. But she could not do that. If she was going to leave the business it had to be at the right time and now was not that time.

John had been standing at the back of the room in his usual spot silent, but proud. Felicity had handled herself remarkedly well under the circumstances.

She looked at him and blew out a breath. “You are quiet. What are you thinking John?”

John walked over to her and he crossed his arms. “I think Slade is spreading false rumors and making the families doubt you. If you want to get their trust back, then a message needs to be sent.”

Felicity knew he was right, but the last thing she wanted or needed was violence. John could tell she was conflicted, but he also knew she had no choice.

“I know you don’t like that Felicity, but I am worried that Slade is going to push Cirelli and Bertinelli just a little too far and then they are going to turn on you.”

Felicity walked to the door. She was done and had enough of this meeting. “I am going to take a shower and change my clothes. Will you drive me to Oliver’s?”

John followed her out. “Do you have to ask? But Felicity? He stopped her with a hand on her arm. She turned and looked at him and he could see the vulnerability in her eyes.

“You can’t run from this. Maybe you should talk to Oliver.”

She nodded and then turned and headed up the stairs.


	13. Chapter 13

John stood still as one of Felicity’s men whispered to him. A curse left his lips when he heard what the man was saying. Slade had gone after Oliver. He rushed up to where Felicity was getting ready in her room and knocked on the door. Felicity opened the door with a smile, ready to go, but then she saw John’s face.

“John…. what?”

“Slade went after Oliver.” John had placed men on Oliver for just this reason, but unfortunately there was more.

Felicity felt the blood drain from her face and if she has been a weaker woman, she would have fainted.

“Don’t worry. Oliver was able to handle himself. In fact, he beat both of Slade’s men and then from what I understand grabbed a gun from Slade’s hand.” Felicity could not relax. Slade had held a gun on Oliver? He would pay for that.

“One more thing Felicity. I don’t want to tell you this part, but you need to know.” John took a deep breath and then told her.

“Slade now has a hit out on Oliver.”

Felicity felt the relief that had started to flood her leave in a whoosh of emotion. She grabbed her phone and her purse.

“I want more guards on Oliver within the hour.”

John followed her downstairs as she rattled off instructions to him. She headed to hear office and he closed the door behind him as she turned back to him.

“I want my best men on him John. Slade knows better than to mess with the Cutler family. He is going to pay for this.”

“What do you have in mind?”

“I need to think on this because I want to make sure the message we send not only hits home for the Wilson family but also for the other family’s that are questioning my leadership.”

“Felicity. You know this is going to push back your plan to get out.” John hated that for her.

“I know. But I can’t think of that right now. Will you take me to Oliver’s apartment?”

John nodded and they walked out to the car. As he drove John made sure that a few more men were sent to shadow Oliver.

As she sat in the back seat her anger only grew. Not only would Slade pay for going after Oliver, it would also send a message to the family elders. _God, she hated this life and now it was affecting a man she cared about, a lot._

John pulled up in front of the apartment complex and walked around to open her door. He could see where her men were stationed along the street and it made him feel better.

“Thank you, John. You can take the night off. Go enjoy some time with Lyla.” She leaned up and kissed his cheek and John watched her walk up the stairs and waited for her to enter the apartment before he left. He stopped to talk to the men. With Felicity there, he wanted to take extra precautions.

***

Felicity knocked on Oliver’s door and when he opened it, she launched herself into his arms. She took him by surprise, but he recovered quickly and held her tight.

“Hey, is everything ok?”

“I should be asking you that question.” She pulled back and looked at him. He seemed fine. “John told me about Slade and his men.”

Oliver sighed and closed the door behind her. “I am fine Felicity.” He walked into the kitchen where he had been working a salad and she followed close behind.

“John told me Slade has a hit out on you.”

Oliver stilled because that was a surprise, but he was not going to let her see he was unnerved.

“Don’t you worry about it. I can handle Slade.” He finished the salad and went to take the bowl to the table when she stopped him, stepping in front of him.

“Oliver what happened?” Her voice was filled with concern and fear and he could not let her worry.

“I went for a run after I left you this morning. Slade and his men were following me. I knew I was being followed so I led them to a “reveal” location and that is what they did. They showed themselves.”

Felicity bit her bottom lip as he continued.

“Slade wanted to talk to me. I refused. I told him we had nothing to talk about. He accused me of getting his way and when his men went to make a move on me, I stopped them.” She could tell Oliver was not comfortable talking about this part, but she needed to know everything.

“Stopped them? How?”

“Let’s just leave it at that Felicity.” He turned to the stove but she was not going to let him turn away.

“No Oliver, please.” She tugged on his arm and turned him back to her. “Don’t shut me out.”

He looked at her eyes and he was powerless to resist her.

“I used some moves I learned in the military to subdue his men and when Slade pulled a gun on me I disarmed him.” He needed to tell her everything. “Then I told Slade that if he came anywhere near you again, he would not walk away a second time.”

Her eyes widened. She could see the toll it had taken on Oliver. His hands were slightly shaking as he set the salad bowl down.

“What am I doing Oliver? I can’t let my life affect yours.”

Oliver could see the worry in her expression, and he took a deep breath before he looked at her.

“You didn’t _LET_ anything happen Felicity. I chose to help you. I chose to take this in a more personal direction.” He indicated the two of them and then took her in his arms and held her loosely in his embrace. He could tell by the look on her face that she was absolutely blaming herself.

Felicity met his gaze with her own and she decided now would be the best time to tell him about her meeting with the family’s. “Today I had a meeting with the heads of the mob family’s in Star City. Slade has them convinced that I cannot handle my family’s business. John feels like I should send them a message letting them know that I can most assuredly handle things.”

Oliver frowned. He trusted John but he did not like the sound of that. “But you are wanting to get out. Why not take this opportunity to choose someone you trust and pass on the business?”

“Because if I make a move right now it is going to show the family as weak. The families will instigate a mob ward to take over some territory that has been in question, but under our control. As much as I hate this life, I can’t do that to my family.”

Oliver didn’t like it one bit. However, he knew that she was right and that if she betrayed her family, she would never forgive herself, no matter how sick and twisted they might be. Felicity pulled away and put some distance between them.

“John agrees with me, but he felt like I should talk to you about it. Please don’t make this hard on me Oliver. I need you to trust me and to support me on this.”

Oliver placed his hands on his hips and sighed, his chin going to his chest. He did trust her, and he wanted to support her no matter what. “What are you thinking?” He lifted his eyes to hers and she could see a shift in his gaze. He was going to support her.

She walked closer and placed her hand son his forearm. “I need to send a message not only to the families but to Slade as well. I know you say you can handle him, and I have no doubt that you can, but the code is different in the mob. When someone tries to harm our loved ones or our family, we retaliate.”

“But I am not family Felicity.”

Her eyes softened and her lips trembled. “But you are the man I care about.”

They stared at each other, her words sinking in to his heart. They were no where near saying I love you, but this was significant. She cared about him, and he cared about her too.

“I care about you too Felicity, which is why it is hard for me to not want to step in and protect you.” He uncrossed his arms and gently rubbed hers. “Ok, I will back this but on one condition.”

She watched him intently. Was he going to say no violence? No one gets hurt? She couldn’t promise that and the thought of letting him down scared her more than any mob family ever could.

“You tell me everything about the plan. The good and the bad. And when it is done, we have another session.”

That was surprising to her. She had no problem keeping him in the loop on what she has planned, in fact it would keep him safer if he knew. But what about the session? Could she endure talking about more of what had transpired in her life?

He could tell she was seriously considering his words. But he could also tell she was struggling. He decided to give her a reprieve.

“Listen, why don’t we sit down. Dinner is ready. We can talk all about this later, ok?” He leaned down and kissed her lips and she nodded returning his kiss before she took a seat at the table. She worried her bottom lip with her teeth as she thought about that. Delving deeper into her past was something she knew they would have to do at some point. But she was not sure if she was ready just yet.

The smell registered with her as he brought their plates to the table. Oliver had truly gone all out and Felicity was impressed. He had made a salad, homemade ravioli and when she tasted his sauce it was simply amazing.

“Oliver, oh my god! This is incredible. Where did you learn to cook like this?”

He smiled as he poured her a glass of wine. “When I was young, we had a housekeeper named Raisa. She was wonderful and like a second mother to my sister and I. Sometimes I would go sit in the kitchen with her and just talk. Being who she was she would not let you sit for long. If you could sit and watch, you could help.”

Felicity warmed as she took another bite. That was one of the few times he had mentioned his family and he had never mentioned a sister.

“You have a sister?”

Oliver’s smile turned tender. “Thea. She is in college in Central City.”

“You have never mentioned her before.” Felicity took a sip of her wine and it was a perfect pairing for his pasta.

Oliver’s eyes shuttered for a moment before he sipped his wine. “I wanted to see where this might be going before I mentioned her.” He took a bite of his food as Felicity looked at him intrigued. “I have never mentioned her to any of my patients. Just like I have never been in a relationship with a patient. All of this is new to me.”

“Where _do_ you see this going?” She held her breath for a moment.

Oliver chewed his food as he thought about that for a moment. “Honestly? I don’t know. What I do know is that I care about you a great deal Felicity. Seeing you has become the best part of my day.”

Felicity smiled her cheeks flushing as she let out a breath. “It is the best part of mine too.”

Oliver put down his fork and took a sip of his wine before he stood from his chair and walked around to hers. He took her hand and pulled her up and before she could figure out what he was doing he had picked her up, his arm going under her knees.

“This food can be heated up later.” His eyes were focused on her lips as he turned and walked toward his bedroom. She wrapped her arms around his neck and sighed.

“Thank god.”

He laughed as he walked into his bedroom and set her feet on the ground. His hands slid up her sides, the silk of her dress allowing his hands to slide easily. They started to undress each other as their eyes met and looked away.

Neither one knew where their relationship was headed but they were both in the moment and for now that was all that mattered.


	14. Chapter 14

Felicity woke early the next morning and softly kissing Oliver’s lips she slipped out of the bed. Pulling on one of his shirts she made her way to the living room. He was still fast asleep, and she had some calls she wanted to make before he woke that morning. Today she was going to set her plan in motion, and she needed to get a hold of John. She would tell Oliver, but after she made her phone calls.

John picked up as quickly as ever and she could hear in his voice that he was ready to get their plan rolling. “Morning John.”

“Good morning Felicity. You ready for all of this?”

“As ready as I will ever be. Listen I need you to come to Oliver’s house this morning so we can go over the details. I want Oliver involved.”

John hesitated. He had told her to talk to Oliver about her plan, but John was not sure about involving him completely. Things must be progressing between him and Felicity quicker than John had realized.

“Are you sure about that Felicity?”

Felicity heard Oliver walk out of the bedroom and she turned and looked at him. She almost said fuck it and tackled him because he looked too damn sexy. He had pulled on a pair of sweats, he was shirtless and barefoot, and his hair was sticking out in all directions. She remembered how her fingers had gripped that hair last night and she bit her bottom lip. Finally, she remembered John was on the phone and had asked her a question. “Very sure.”

“Ok. I will be there in 20 minutes.”

Felicity hung up the phone as Oliver’s eyes slid over her. His shirt hit her at mid-thigh, and he had to admit his shirt had never looked that good on him. He walked over and took her in his arms giving her a kiss that curled her toes.

“Good morning.” She murmured against his lips as her arms slid up around his neck.

“Good morning. Who were you talking to?” He nuzzled her neck and she shivered.

“John. He is on his way here.” She felt Oliver still and then he pulled back and looked at her. “We need to get our message out today, so he is coming here to get started.” She removed her arms and looked at her phone. “I have one more call to make and then we will talk.”

Oliver released her and watched as she walked over to the window and quick dialed a number. He only heard her side of the conversation, but it was telling. “Cisco, hi. Yeah, I am good, listen I need your help.” She turned and looked at Oliver as she spoke. “I need you to freeze Slade Wilson’s bank account for me. Yes now. Thank you I owe you one.”

She hung up and looked at him with a slight smile. “Sometimes hitting someone in the bank account is better than breaking their arms or legs.”

Oliver frowned and placed his hands on his hips. He looked damn sexy, but Felicity had to ignore that right now. This was too important. Felicity motioned to the couch. “Let’s talk.” She sat down and Oliver only hesitated a moment before he joined her.

She needed to explain from the beginning. “In my business, when someone threatens someone in the family you have two choices. You can send them a message. Hit them where it hurts the most, or you can kill them.”

She saw Oliver’s eyes widened as that realization hit him. This was her world and the fact that she could talk about it so easily was disconcerting.

“I don’t want to kill Slade because if I do then it will start a mob war. I need the Wilson family on my side because when I get ready to step down, we need them to be our allies.” She paused and then continued. “So, my plan is to first, hit Slade where it will really hurt. His bank account. He recently received a lump sum that was due to him for being the next in line with his family. There is no way in hell he wants to lose that.”

Oliver could deal with that. It was straight forward and simple. “Ok, and the second part?”

“I want John to be here before we discuss that.” Oliver wanted to press her, to make her tell him but he could wait.

“I should go get dressed.” He started to walk to the bedroom, but Felicity touched his arm stopping him.

“Hey, are you ok with all of this?” He saw the worry in her face and he gently cupped her cheek.

“I honestly cannot answer that question. But I do know one thing. I care about you and that is what I am focusing on.” He leaned down and kissed her before making his way to the bedroom. Felicity sighed and then followed him. She needed to get dressed as well and when she entered the bedroom and heard the shower, she knew that was for the best. They could talk more after John left.

***

John shook Oliver’s hand as he walked into Oliver’s apartment and Oliver shut the door behind him. When he received Felicity’s call that morning, he was surprised that she wanted him to come to Oliver’s apartment. They usually discussed these scenarios in her office. Maybe this was a small step toward Felicity wanting to be free. She obviously trusted Oliver just as much as she trusted him, so he should too.

Felicity gave John a hug as he took a seat and Oliver and Felicity sat on the couch across from him. He saw Oliver reach over and take Felicity’s hand which told him they were a united front. He liked that.

“I called Cisco and I had him freeze all of Slade’s accounts. Any minute now we should hear some rumblings from the Wilson camp. But we need to do more.” John listened as Felicity looked at Oliver and then back at him. “I want our men to take Slade to our warehouse and convince him to remove the hit on Oliver by any means necessary.”

John knew exactly what she was talking about, but he wondered if Oliver did. John knew they had to tread carefully since Slade was the son of the rival mob family, but they were not as strong as the Cutler’s and he knew if things were done right this would be seen for exactly what it was intended. Retaliation for threatening a Cutler’ family member.

John looked at Oliver. “Are you ok with that?”

They did not know that during his time in Hong Kong that Oliver had worked for a crime lord. They did not know that he had done things that would make even the most hardened mob enforcer cringe. At some point he would tell them, but not today.

“John, I want Felicity out of this life. I want her away from the violence and the pain. I know you do too. However, that is not going to happen overnight. If it means it will keep her safe. If making a stand means she will win the respect of the other families while we plan on her release, then I can look the other way.” He looked at Felicity and then back at John.

Felicity decided to throw out the last tidbit. She knew she would get some pushback and Oliver might be angry with her, but this was non-negotiable. “John, I want to handle this one myself.”

John sucked in a breath as Oliver looked at her in shock. “Felicity…….” Oliver started to protest but when Felicity looked at him with a steely glint he paused.

“I have to handle this myself for two reasons. The first is that the other families will still consider me weak if I send someone in my place. Second, he threatened Oliver. They were going to beat him up or worse and know they have a hit out on him.” She looked at John. “I am handling this one myself.”

Oliver stood and paced. “John can you give us a minute?”

John stood. “I need to go call some of our men to get Slade to the warehouse.” He nodded to Oliver and then walked out the front door. He knew that Oliver was not going to get her to change her mind, but he could respect him trying.

“Oliver don’t’ fight me on this please. I must show these men that I am just as strong as they are, even stronger. You know what this business is like. It is brutal.”

“Felicity I get that. But I can’t let you do this because of me.” He walked over and stood looking down at her with worry in his eyes. “You remember when you told me about the darkness and how it can swallow you whole? I know what that is like. I have been in that hole. I can’t let you go down it for me.”

Felicity met his eyes and he could see hers were shimmering with so many emotions. “Oliver I am already in it. I have lived in this hole my entire life. But do you know what will be different this time?” She placed her hands on his chest. “I have you this time.” She looked up and made him meet her eyes. “I was alone before. Yes, I had John in my corner, but I was still alone. I have not felt that loneliness since the day I met you.”

Oliver sighed. He hated it. He hated the idea, the thought of it. More importantly he hated that part of why she was having to do it was because of him. But he could understand her need to do it. Something had to be done.

“I have a condition of you moving forward with this plan.” Oliver wrapped his arms around her, and she smiled at him.

“It’s cute that you think you can stop me. I am head of a mob family Oliver.”

Oliver rolled his eyes at her.

“I’m sorry. Ok. What is your condition?” She tried to hide her smile because his facial expression was priceless.

“You take John with you and he stays in the room with you. He does not leave your side for any reason.”

Felicity smiled up at him and then leaned up on her tiptoes and kissed him. “Deal.”

Oliver pulled her closer and kissed her again, this time deepening it. She wrapped her arms tightly around his neck and then buried her face in his neck.

“I can’t have anything happen to you Felicity. I love you.”

Felicity stilled against him and pulled back. Oliver tensed wondering if the words had been spoken too soon. “You……you what?”

“I love you.” He said the words simply and clearly.

Felicity was stunned. How long had it been since anyone had said those three simple words to her? The last time her father had told her he loved her was when she was 10 and he started grooming her to take over the business. Her mother had told her that just days before she died. That seemed so long ago. No man had ever uttered those words to her romantically and hearing them was like lighting a candle in her dim dark world. That hope that she had felt when she met him spread and as tears formed in her eyes she gave him the most luminous smile he had ever seen.

He gently cupped her face and kissed her softly and she whispered.

“I love you too Oliver.”


	15. Chapter 15

Slade struggled against the restraints as he looked around the darkened room he had been thrown into. He recognized Felicity’s men and he would be lying if he said he was not a little fearful. His anger raged inside of him as he tried to free his hands. Why had they brought him here?

He heard the door open and turned to see the same two men coming into the room. They grabbed him by his arms and hauled him up, dragging him out the door. They had his mouth taped shut so he could not ask them where they were taking him, so he frantically looked around trying to recognize something, anything.

They walked into a well-lit, windowless room and placed him in a chair. His bindings were removed and then replaced securing him to the chair. His breathing quickened as he looked around. He knew this room and he knew what this room was for.

The two men left, and Slade twisted and turned trying to free himself. He had no luck as they had tightened the ropes to the point of cutting off circulation to his hands. If he struggled the rope bit into his flesh and it hurt.

He decided to wait and see who came into the room. Maybe he could talk to them; reason with them. He heard the door open behind him and he tried to turn his head to see who had entered, but the way he was strapped down, he could not turn. His voice was muffled as he tried to talk and then he stopped as the person came into view.

Felicity entered the room, her face ice cold and her eyes showing no pity for the man who sat before her. She walked within his view and took great delight in the look of utter surprise that crossed his face. John walked up beside her and crossed his massive arms across his chest as they both looked at Slade. She motioned to his gag and John removed it as she walked over to a nearby table.

“Felicity, what is going on? Why did you have your men take me and why am I here?” Slade’s voice was tinged with anger and annoyance, yet also a trace of fear.

Felicity looked at the items on the table and picked up a small blade, about the size of a pairing knife. “Why are you here? You mean to tell me you don’t know?” She turned back to Slade and her eyes held utter disdain.

Slade looked confused as he watched her approach. “I have no idea.”

Felicity rolled her eyes. So, he was going to play the dumb card. _Bad choice_. She stepped closer and when Slade saw the blade in her hand his eyes widened, and fear became more pronounced.

“Does placing a hit on Dr. Oliver Queen ring a bell with you?”

Slade’s eyes darkened with anger. “He is not one of us Felicity.”

Felicity let the blade of her knife dance along his left arm leaving a thin red line that made him hiss in pain. “Oliver is important to me. And you are messing with someone that I consider just as important as family.” Her voice was hard and cold and left no doubt that she was angry.

“What was your talk with Oliver about Slade?” She played with the knife as she stood before him waiting for him to answer.

Slade’s voice was shaking slightly. “I wanted to warn him not to get in my way.”

“Why?”

“Because, you and I make a formidable combination Felicity. Your father promised me that one day our families would join. You were promised to me.”

Felicity frowned. “What are you talking about?”

Slade could tell he had taken her by surprise. “Didn’t he tell you? He and my father made a pact when you became of age that one day you and I would join our family’s. My father gave your father the land on the east side of the docks in exchange for our marriage.”

Felicity was shocked, but not surprised. There were a lot of things about her father that filled her with anger. The fact he had promised her hand in marriage to someone that she did not love was almost overwhelming. But she could not let Slade see that.

“Well he is no longer here or in charge. I am. That “agreement’ is null and void.” She leaned down so she could look him in the eye. “Now, what you are going to do is call off the hit on Dr. Queen.”

Slade laughed nervously but also arrogantly. “I will do no such thing. That will make me look weak.”

Felicity back handed him across the face and was satisfied to see his lip bleeding when he looked at her again. “Try a different answer.”

John stood watching stoically. He wanted to rip Slade’s head off, but he needed to let Felicity handle things. She was doing a beautiful job. He could see the fear in Slade’s eyes. John had been worried when he heard Slade mention the agreement between their families. Knowing her as he did, he could tell that it had shaken her, but she had hidden that from Slade well.

Felicity grabbed a chair and pulled it in front of Slade sitting as if she was about to sip tea, but her eyes were turbulent and deadly. “Here is the deal Slade. You remove the hit on Queen and keep yourself and your men away from him or next time we meet in this room you will be leaving with one less limb. Do we understand each other?”

Slade could not stifle the huff of a laugh that left his lips. “That is not you Felicity. You are not that strong.”

Felicity took the knife and placed it to his throat, and when he saw the look in her eyes he knew she had spoken too soon.

“Don’t ever underestimate me Slade.”

Slade just stared at her, so she took her knife and ran it down this right arm, this time much deeper. He screamed as the blood started to flow. It would leave a scar and that was exactly what she wanted. He needed to have a reminder of their talk.

“YES! Ok, Ok!” Slade yelled the words as she pulled her knife away from his arm. He glared at her, but she just smiled.

“I am so glad we could work this out amicably.” She stood and moved the chair back to the side of the room before placing the blade on the table. “John you know what to do.” She looked at John and then gave Slade a deadly look before she walked out the door. John called in his men and informed them to take Slade and drop him off at his home before he walked out to join Felicity.

Felicity slid into the back seat and that was when she started to shake. It was not from what she had done. She had no remorse about that and knew he deserved a lot worse. Her shakes were from his words about her father. He had been willing to sell her to the Wilson family. If he had been alive today, he would have forced her to marry that piece of shit and there would have been nothing she could have done about it. She had always known that her father was a man that was

John slipped into the front seat and when he saw her face through the rear-view mirror he quickly pulled away and headed to the one place that he knew would do her the most good. He headed to Dr. Queen’s office.

***

Oliver paced in his office as he waited to hear from Felicity. He had just finished with his last client for the day and now all he had was time. He thought about going home but he could not get his feet to budge. He was too focused on waiting for her to call.

He heard a knock at his door and his assistant poked her head inside. “Mr. Queen, I am heading out for the day. But before I go you have two visitors.” She smiled and stepped aside, and Felicity walked in with John close behind. She walked straight to him and he wrapped her in his arms as his assistant quietly closed the door.

Oliver felt Felicity’s arms tighten around him, her body trembling and her head buried in his shirt. He looked at John concerned.

“Felicity? What’s wrong? Are you ok?” His anger rose. “Did that bastard hurt you?”

Felicity could not speak so John did. “No. Not in the way you think. While Felicity was having her “talk” with him he told her that her father had made a deal with his family while he was still alive.”

Oliver frowned. “A deal? What kind of deal?”

“He and Slade’s father made a deal that when Felicity was old enough that she would marry Slade.”

Oliver’s arms tightened involuntarily. “He was going to force her to marry Slade?”

John nodded and then walked to the door. “Take care of her. That information hit her pretty hard.”

John walked out closing the door behind him. As soon as they were alone Oliver picked her up and carried her to the couch. He sat down sitting her on his lap and gently stroked her back. He could feel her trembling and when she pulled back and their eyes met, he could see the hurt shining there.

“Hey.” He spoke softly and then wiped a lone tear that was sliding down her cheek.

“Hey.” She was so happy to be in his arms, that the feelings she had been fighting since leaving Slade were starting to subside.

“What can I do?” Oliver wanted to do something for her. Anything to take her mind off the information that she had just learned about her father. Her father was dead, he could not force her to marry anyone, but Oliver knew the betrayal was what hurt the most.

“It didn’t surprise me. I know the monster that my father was. But the fact that he traded my freedom for more territory. I can never forgive that.”

“Sometimes the people that hurt us the most are the ones closest to us.”

She squeezed his hand and then stood and rubbed her hands over her face as she crossed the room. “You know he once told me that I was the future of our family. That I would be the one to take our family to new levels within the business.” She turned and looked at him and he could see a realization hitting its mark. “He was referring to me marrying Slade.”

“How did you end up engaged to Slade in the first place?” Oliver looked at her wanting to know the answer to that question.

“My father told me that an alliance between our families would benefit us and would benefit me when ever I took over the family. He convinced me that my marrying Slade would make him happy.”

Oliver understood immediately. “And you would do anything to make him happy.”

She nodded. “When my parents died, I went through a period of denial. I felt like I had let them down by not somehow protecting them. So, when Slade approached me, I said yes.”

Oliver stood and approached her. “Do you remember when I confronted you about Slade and your engagement? That was the day you admitted that you wanted out.”

Felicity nodded. She couldn’t say much.

“Felicity it is ok to have wanted the approval of your father.” He said the words softly. “But it is also ok to hate him. He used you. He would have continued to use you. You can love him but hate him too.”

She didn’t want to think about her father anymore. She was with Oliver. She wanted to focus on that and focus on him. “Slade agreed to remove the contract on you.”

Oliver realized that she was trying to change the subject, so he let it drop. They could talk more about that topic later. Oliver looked at her with a grimace. “Do I want to know how you convinced him?”

“Maybe I will tell you sometime. But not today.”

“Ok. Well then can I interest you in dinner?”

She gave him a coy look. “Yes, but we will need to do it at my house. I have a meeting with some of my men tonight and I need to be close by when the word gets out about what I did to Slade.”

Oliver walked around his desk and shut off his computer. “Ok. I need to go get some clothes and then I will stop by the store and pick up a few items. I will meet you there?”

Felicity smiled as he approached, and he leaned down and kissed her sweetly before leading her out of his office. They walked to her car where John was patiently waiting and when they approached John could see Felicity was doing much better. John met Oliver’s eyes and when Oliver gave him an almost imperceptible nod, he knew they would talk later.

John opened the door and held it as Felicity turned and gave Oliver one more kiss. “Don’t be long.” She smiled and then slipped into the car and when John closed the door, he approached Oliver.

“Take her directly home John. I am going to run by and grab some clothes and a few items from the store and then I will be there. You and I can talk later.”

John nodded and then got into the front seat. Oliver watched as they drove away and then he walked to his car. He wanted to get done as quickly as possible so he could get home to Felicity. He stopped and picked up a few items at the store and at the last minute threw in a pint of mint chip ice cream. Felicity had mentioned that it was her favorite and there was nothing he would not do to see her smile. Today had been difficult on her, but tonight he would help her to forget about her father. Tonight, they would enjoy the evening as if this world did not exist.

Tonight, he would show her love.


	16. Chapter 16

Oliver had gathered his things and was about to walk out the door of his apartment when he stopped in his tracks. He shut the front door and leaned against it as a realization hit him. He had not had aggressive, violent thoughts for several years. It had been during his last strong PTSD episode, but he was having them now. He did note that the feelings were different this time. That they were stemming from a strong need to protect Felicity, the woman he loved.

He closed his eyes and breathed through his nose. _Shit!_ He did love her. He loved her with every part of him. He needed to deal with that. And he needed to deal with his protective instincts. It has always been that way for him.

Oliver thought of Slade and the world that Felicity had been born into and he grimaced. He wanted to go find Slade and show him just exactly what he was capable of; what that world had taught him. It had been brutal, bloody and sometimes scary and he still could not shake how easily he had taken to it. Those in higher ranks use to call him a natural until he had even surpassed them. Becoming a Bratva Captain had been the culmination of years of no emotions, no feelings, just cold and he had traversed that world well. But Felicity wanted out of that kind of life. She wanted away from the violence and rage that filled that world. It would not be good for him to go down that path. Not again.

She was hurting right now because she had learned that her father had bartered her like a commodity. It was like she had been given to the highest bidder. There was no concern for her feelings or what she might want, and he knew that feeling was cutting deeper than any knife ever could.

Oliver stood and grabbed his things, locking up his apartment as he headed to his car. They needed to talk about those feelings. She needed to get them out. He would help her with that tonight so that she could move forward. Tonight, he was going to show her just how much she was loved.

***

Felicity climbed the stairs to her room with John right behind her. Neither one spoke and when she walked into her room and shut the door, John touched it feeling her pain before he walked away. Oliver would be here soon, so he headed downstairs to meet up with him.

Felicity started to shed her clothes immediately. She needed a shower; a hot shower. She was still feeling a little numb and that bothered her. She had known what kind of man her father was for years but for some reason Slade’s words had hit her exceptionally hard today. The only reason she could think of was that because of her sessions with Oliver, she was starting to feel instead of suppressing.

She turned on the water and let it run until the steam started to coat the mirror. She had been staring at her reflection as the water ran and when she could no longer see herself, she stepped inside. The hot water burned slightly but she did not wince. It was cathartic and she stepped fully underneath the spray letting it wash away her feelings of hurt and disappointment.

Being betrayed by her father was nothing new to her. It was a part of this life. It made you feel not quite good enough and because of it she had gone through a period of low self-esteem. Her teen years had been difficult because with her father trying to marry her off, she had felt like she was unlovable. That the only way someone would want her was if her father bribed them. She never thought in her wildest dreams that she would find a man that would love her for herself.

She leaned her hands against the wall and lowered her head to allow the water to stream down her back. She didn’t hear the bathroom door open, as she was too lost in her thoughts. It wasn’t until two strong arms wrapped around her from behind that she finally let go and cried those feelings of insecurity and betrayal away.

Oliver pulled her back against him and held her. When he had arrived a few moments before the look that John had given him told him what words could not. He had rushed up the stairs and using his key, entered her bedroom. Placing his bag on the floor he had followed her trail of clothes and not caring that he was fully clothed he had stepped into the shower behind her.

Felicity was too distraught to notice his clothing and even when she turned and buried her head in his chest, her hands gripped his shirt tight. The thin material plastered against his skin, but he did not move.

He leaned his head down to where his lips were brushing her ear and he just started to talk to her. “It’s going to be ok Felicity. Your father is not here, it is just you and me. Hold on to me. Direct your anger to me. Let it out my love.”

His words slowly penetrated her mind and she pulled back and looked up at him. Seeing his loving, accepting blue eyes her anger surfaced. The hands that were gripping his shirt started to push against his chest, but he was like a wall. He stood still and did not move. Her anger grew as she pushed harder, trying to upset his balance, trying to push him away. Oliver let his hands fall to his sides as she started to push and pummel his chest. He did not wince or say a word, because this was exactly what she needed. She needed someone or something to direct her anger toward. Her father was dead. He was no longer here. But Oliver was.

She hit and struck out at him, the feelings taking every ounce of her strength and then she collapsed against him. She wound her arms up around his neck and he held her. He reached forward and turned off the taps before he exited the shower. Placing her feet on the floor he grabbed a towel and started to dry her off. He started at her head and worked his way slowly, methodically down to her feet. When he stood back up and she looked at him he could see his Felicity again in her eyes. She would be ok.

She started to unbutton his shirt letting the wet fabric fall to the floor. Neither one cared that a puddle was forming where his drenched clothes were landing. They only had eyes for each other. Oliver toed off his shoes and when he was naked, she took the towel from him and dried him off.

Oliver watched her with hooded eyes, not the least ashamed of the affect she had on his body. He knew that now was not the time to be thinking of sex, but his body had other ideas. She was so beautiful, and he was just a man. A man totally, irreversibly in love with this woman.

She dropped the towel and he picked her up and carried her to the bed. They both slipped under the covers and he pulled her right up against him. They were touching from chest to toe and she slipped her knee between his thighs as they faced each other and looked at one another. This was their bubble, their intimate place for just the two of them. It was where they both felt free. Nothing else mattered.

“Thank you.” Her words were soft, and her breath brushed his face.

“You never have to thank me Felicity. I love you. I will always be here for you.”

She ran her fingers through his scruff. It was one of her favorite things to do. It was grounding and calming for her.

“Oliver, tell me about Hong Kong.”

He gave her a curious look. “Why?”

“Because I need to know more about you. I need to know just how far you have gone. What made you the man you are today.”

Oliver leaned his head on his elbow but did not move away from the closeness they were sharing.

“The man that captured me, that I worked for was named Anatoly Knyazav. He was the Pakan of the Bratva.”

He let that sink in for a moment and she looked at him shocked. “The Russian Mafia?”

Oliver nodded and then continued. “He took a liking to me. The years of torture that I had endured he said made me сильнее (stronger).” She frowned and he explained. “Stronger. He said that he wanted me to train with the Bratva. He needed an enforcer and he felt I was the perfect person. He immediately started me through initiation.”

Felicity saw his eyes shutter as his memories flooded back and she gently stroked his arm, conveying that he was ok. He was safe here with her, in their cocoon.

“It was a brutal process. Each fight was to the death.” She shuddered and he pulled her closer. “The men I fought were strong, but they all were missing something. A reason to live, to survive. I had a reason. It was so that maybe one day I could return home to my family. So, each fight to me was survival. I did what I had to do to survive.”

“Is that how you got your scars?” She let her hands roam to his back, and she traced each one with a light touch.

“Yes, some of them. Some of them I received while working a target.”

He let his hands caress her skin, the softness calming to him. “The thing that was hard for me to come to terms with was not the killing or even the violence. It was how easy it came to me.”

“What do you mean?” She could see something in his eyes that touched a part buried deep down inside of her.

His hand continued an abstract pattern on her skin, and it made her body warm. “I never turned down a request that Anatoly made of me. I never hesitated at what needed to be done. By the time I left Hong Kong, I had worked my way up to Captain.”

She sat up and looked at him in shock, his hands falling away. “You are a Captain of the Bratva?”

Oliver sat up next to her immediately missing the feel of her skin beneath his fingers. “Yes. Does that bother you?” He had been hesitant to tell her about this, but he wanted her to know everything about him. She needed to know what kind of man he had been; who and what he really was.

Her eyes softened. “Of course not. How could you even think that?”

“Because I am a killer Felicity. Yes, today I am a therapist. I no longer live that life. But it is still there, deep in my bones. When I thought that Slade had somehow hurt you, I wanted to kill him. Plain and simple. It was as natural a reaction as breathing.”

She placed a hand to his cheek. “Oliver this life consumes you. It chips away pieces of your soul. But somehow you escaped. You made it out and you created a better, more normal life for yourself. I can’t imagine the strength it took for you to do that.”

Oliver stroked her hair, the feeling of unburdening to her making him feel lighter, better. She made him better.

She leaned forward and kissed him softly. “You are my inspiration Oliver. My light. I look at you and see that anything is possible. That a normal life is possible. And knowing what I know now, just solidifies that feeling for me.”

“Felicity I can’t promise that I won’t ever revert to that man again. Dealing with PTSD had a lot of unknowns. If someone hurts you, I can’t promise that the Bratva Captain in me won’t feel a need to do something.”

“But what about your reputation as a therapist? If you retaliate in any way and it gets out, your career would be gone.” The thought of him losing something so important to him because of her, made her take pause.

“Felicity, do you know something that I also learned during my time in Hong Kong? Despite the violence, despite the death and the turmoil? I learned that nothing is forever. That I am capable of adapting, of changing. But more importantly I learned that I am someone that will do anything, and I mean anything, for those I love.” He gently stroked her cheek. “I can stand losing my license. I can even stand losing my practice. What I could not stand would be to lose you.”

She sucked in a breath at the sheer sincerity in his words and in his eyes.

“I guess the question is, could you deal with that?”

“I don’t expect you to hide that side of you Oliver.” She gently traced the star that was tattooed over his heart. “It is part of who you are and the man I love. That will never change.”

Felicity reached under her pillow and pulled out the knife that she kept there every single night. She placed it on the night stand behind her. The symbolism was not lost on either of them, but he had to ask.

“Why did you move your knife?”

She smiled softly. “That knife for so many years represented safety for me. It was a reassurance that no one, no man, would ever hurt me again. With you here, I don’t need it. I know you will protect me.” She let her finger slide along his lips as her eyes fell to them. “I know that you will never betray me.”

Her eyes looked back up into his and the love and trust that were shining there pushed all of Oliver’s fears and doubts away.

They sat holding each other gently tracing each other’s skin with their fingers, their breaths becoming one, just talking, voices low. It was more intimate than any sexual act either one had ever encountered, and it only made their bond stronger.

Felicity’s phone lit up and Slade’s name crossed her screen. He had just found out about his bank accounts and he was livid. But neither noticed as they stayed in that moment, in their own piece of solitude.

The real world could wait.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is not an overly long chapter but I wanted to give you guys an updated. Enjoy!!

John walked the grounds as he normally did every evening. The night that Felicity had been attacked in her bedroom had been a wake-up call and from that moment on John was always sure to either check the grounds himself or have one of his trusted men do it. Not only did it allow John to feel secure in the fact that she was safe, but it also gave him a chance to check in with his men and see how things were running as far as security for the family. This evening, he had been on the east side of the property near the road and was about to turn back toward the house when someone struck him from behind. His world went black.

***

Felicity stirred after having fallen asleep in Oliver’s arms. She glanced and the clock and realized it was only midnight. The evening before had been emotionally and physically draining and as she looked over at Oliver sleeping soundly, she smiled. What a wonderful surprise he had been in her life. Who would have thought that by deciding to make a change in her life that her life would change in a completely different way?

She let her hand drift down over his shoulder and arm, her eyes tracing the scars that littered his torso. What hell he must have gone through during his time in Hong Kong. It amazed her that with everything he had been through, that he was such a good man. He was her man.

She let her lips drift over his back, as her hands continued to feel the ridges and puckered skin of each moment that Oliver had endured pain. Her eyes watered as she thought of everything he had endured. Gun shots, stabbings and burns. Her lips softly kissed each scar with reverence for the man he had been and the man he was now. He stirred underneath her touch and when he opened his eyes, the intensity of her look surprised him.

“Hey.”

She kissed his shoulder and then gave him a soft smile. “Hey.”

“How are you feeling?” He pulled her closer to him and she nestled against him.

“Better. Talking to you made me feel better.” She nuzzled his neck with her nose and his fingers traced patterns on her arm. Oliver noted she had a missed call on her phone that was beside the bed and when she picked it up and saw it was Slade, she showed it to Oliver. They both listened as an angry Slade spoke into her voicemail demanding she restore his bank accounts.

It was no surprise to her. She had been expecting this call.

They both jumped as a frantic knocking came at her bedroom door. Oliver motioned for her to stay put and he pulled on his pants before opening the door. One of her men stood there and he looked nervously at Oliver before Felicity, who had thrown on her robe, walked up next to him.

“Ms. Cutler, I am sorry to bother you, but I thought you should know that John is missing.”

Oliver’s eyes flew back around to the man standing there. “Missing? What do you mean missing?”

The man swallowed and Oliver could see a little fear lingering in his eyes. “He went to do his nightly walk of the grounds and he has not come back. We tried to reach him by his walkie talkie, but he is not answering.”

Felicity looked at Oliver with concern and Oliver turned to the man. “Go gather some men and meet me in the foyer.” The man looked to Felicity and when she assured him that he should do as Oliver said he hurried off.

They both quickly dressed, and Felicity walked over to her dresser. She pulled a gun from the top drawer and then handed it to Oliver. “You might need this.” He kissed her quickly and then they walked down the stairs together, their hands clasped, a united front.

There were a handful of men waiting in the foyer and Felicity approached them with Oliver. “I am going to make some calls in my office. I want all our men to treat Oliver as if he is me. Whatever he says goes, is that understood?”

She met the gaze of each man and they all nodded before turning their attention to the man who was sleeping with the head of the family. They did not know much about him, but they were loyal to Felicity and because of that they would be loyal to Oliver.

He dispatched each of the men in groups of two to blanket the grounds. If anyone found John, they were to report back immediately. Oliver took one of the men with him and they walked out the back door on high alert.

***

Felicity walked into her office and closed the door behind her. She needed to make a call because based on the fact she had a missed call from Slade, she wondered if he was not behind John’s disappearance. Slade picked up on the second ring and his voice dripped with sarcasm.

“Felicity, I have been waiting for your call.”

She responded in an ice cold, deadly tone. “Where is he?”

“Where’s who?”

“John, where is he?”

“I don’t know…….”

“Don’t fuck with me Slade. I swear to god if you hurt him you will pay with your life. Now, where is he?” John was like a brother to her, he was family, and everyone knew it.

“He is safe. For now.” Slade’s voice rang through the line and it sent shivers down Felicity’s spine. “You have exactly one hour to restore my bank accounts or I will send John back to you in pieces.”

“You are going to pay for this Slade. Let me be very clear. If you so much as put one scratch on John, your family will regret crossing the Kutler Family. Am I clear?”

Slade was so angry he was shaking and if he was being honest, he was afraid. But what was done was done. He was known in his family for being a hot head and if the family knew how far he had gone, they would not be happy. But he could not turn back now.

“Just get my accounts turned on. You have one hour.”

Slade hung up and Felicity threw her phone down and immediately ran to get Oliver. They had some plans to make and it did not include turning back on Slade’s accounts.

***

Oliver and his men had been searching the grounds for about 15 minutes when he saw Felicity hurrying toward him. Her face was set in anger and the fact that Slade had called her made his gut clench.

“Oliver. I just got off the phone with Slade. He has John. He told me I have one hour to unfreeze his bank accounts, or they will send him to me in pieces.”

Oliver’s anger rose as his fists clenched and he looked at the men. “Go gather the rest of the men and meet me back here.” They did not hesitate and soon he and Felicity were left alone.

“How do you want to handle this?” Oliver knew what he wanted to do but this was Felicity’s family. She had to decide.

“I am not giving into Slade and we need to make sure that his family gets a very specific message.” Oliver had a feeling he knew what that was going to be, and he wondered at that moment if he could tiptoe back into that world and come out the other side unscathed.

“I want you to take the men and go to Slade’s house. Find John. And then I want you to bring Slade back to me.”

“What about the other family members?”

“It’s just Slade’s Uncle and cousin and they will respect what we have to do. I have a feeling they know nothing about this because they would not dare cross me.”

Oliver nodded and then leaned down and kissed her. She could tell he was slightly off, and she placed her hand on his arm to stop him from leaving. “Are you ok with this Oliver?”

He looked down into her blue eyes and he knew at that moment he would do anything for this woman. If he had to go back to the dark side of himself, even for one day, he would do it for her.

“I am fine Felicity.” He kissed her again and as the men started to return Felicity listened as Oliver made a plan of attack that would make John proud. Her eyes lingered on him as he and the men left, and she prayed that every one of them came back safe.

***

Slade paced in front of John who was slouched in the chair he was tied to, glaring at Slade. He had been tough to take down, but Slade had made sure to take three men with him for insurance. They had to knock the big guy out just to get him to the car and when he woke up, luckily, they already had him tied to the chair.

Slade made sure to keep his mouth gagged. He didn’t need John trying any psychological conversations with him. He just needed to get access to his money and then he would let John go.

When he had been notified from his bank, he knew immediately who had done that to him and he had been angry. How dare that woman freeze his assets. His first thought had been to go after her, but he knew better than that. She was with Oliver Queen and would not be so easy to get to. After his attack on her in her bedroom had failed John has beefed up security around her. So, he done the next best thing. He had gone after John.

Now he just had to sit and wait, but little did he know that everything was about to change.

***

Oliver and his men arrived and parked a block away from the Wilson compound. He guessed you could call it a compound. One of Felicity’s men had informed him that it was a mansion set on a gated property that only had 4 heavily armed men. They had gone over the layout and Oliver had learned quickly that this was going to be an easy target.

The men dispersed in each direction per the instructions that Oliver had given them earlier and Oliver himself crept up through the front. He easily climbed the fence that surrounded the property and then once he was sure that there was no one in sight he made his way to the front side of the home.

He knew from years of training that the front was usually the least guarded because people never expected someone to be as bold as to come through the front door. It was a tactic he had used many times. It was one he was counting on today.

He straightened when he saw a guard walking around the side of the house, but when the guy fell to the ground and one of Felicity’s men appeared, he relaxed and proceeded to work the locks. He gave a silent laugh as they were easy to pick and when he opened the door and glanced inside there was no one about. _Just as he had suspected_.

He glanced down at his phone as he received a signal from each group that they had subdued the guards and Oliver moved forward with determination. He was going to find John and then Slade was going to pay for ever having crossed Felicity and her family. 

Oliver had decided to that if he got a few shots of his own in on Slade during the process well he would be all the better for it.

He made his way down the hallway noting the sitting room, library and what he guessed was an office. Slade was not stupid enough to hide John in plain sight, especially if his family was unaware of what he had done. No, he would have him somewhere down in the basement and Oliver made his way toward the area he assumed was the kitchen. An opening to the basement would be nearby and from there he could set the second part of his plan in motion.

Oliver waited as his men slowly met up with him. Each group had a body of a guard and as Oliver located the door to the basement, he motioned for them to be silent as he crept down the stairs. He could see Slade pacing in front of John who was awake but tied up and so Oliver moved back and motioned for each guard to be thrown down the stairs. They were already dead and when Slade’s eyes widened as one after the other lay at his feet, Oliver smiled a grim smile.

He was coming for Slade and he always got his man.


	18. Chapter 18

Slade bellowed as three of his guards landed at his feet. He felt rage like never before and drew his gun placing it directly to John’s head as his eyes frantically looked at the stairwell.

“I know you and your men are there Felicity. Show yourself you stupid bitch.” He snarled the words as he waited, his eyes shifting frantically around. He would not be taken by surprise again.

Oliver slowly made his way down the stairs. His movements were slow but relaxed as if he did not have a care in the world. His men were behind him and when they all reached the bottom and Oliver assured himself that John was ok, he turned his focus to Slade.

“Slade. I would think kidnapping is a little beneath you.”

Slade’s eyes had widened when he saw it was Oliver, not Felicity. “Queen. You doing that bitches bidding now?”

Oliver’s eyes narrowed as he watched Slade’s every move. He wanted to be able to anticipate anything. “I would tread very carefully Slade.”

“I gave her an hour to get my accounts restored.” He pushed the gin into John’s temple and John winced. However, he caught Oliver’s eye and let him know that he was alert. Slade took out his phone ready to check his accounts when Oliver laughed a cold laugh.

“She is not going to restore your accounts Slade. In fact, I would gather that there are some very happy charity’s receiving some big donations right about now.” Oliver crossed his arms over his chest and Slade’s rage exploded.

He turned his gun to Oliver and slowly approached him, his anger had taken over. “Well then Mr. Queen. It seems you have a big problem.” He got closer to Oliver, and Oliver waited patiently. He was doing exactly what Oliver wanted him to do.

Slade looked at the men behind Oliver. They were all standing behind him but none of them had drawn their weapon. _Oh, that was good_. If they had any loyalty to Oliver, they would have drawn their guns as soon as Slade stepped within 5 feet of Oliver. This might go better than Slade had hoped.

Oliver just stared at him casually but if you looked close enough you could see a deadly shimmer in his eyes. Oliver had easily slipped into enforcer mode and he was just waiting, ready. As soon as Slade was close enough, he dropped his gun and clicked off the safety. This was surprising to Oliver, but he did not show it. He waited.

“I have wanted to take you on Queen for a while now and now I have my chance.” He looked at the men behind Oliver and then punched him in the face.

Oliver’s head flew back, and his hand went to his face. _Damn that hurt_. Oliver straightened back up and then looked Slade in the eye as if nothing had happened.

“What’s wrong Queen? You afraid to take me on without backup? I think your boys here are turning out to be a little more loyal to me than they are to you.” Slade was getting cocky and this time he punched Oliver in the stomach.

Oliver doubled over and coughed as the air left his lungs. He slowly straightened back up and Slade had to admit the man had balls. This time he decided to go for the throat but when he sent his punch out, Oliver grabbed Slade’s arm and twisted it behind his back. A scream of pain echoed through the room as everyone heard a bone crack.

Oliver let him go pushing him back. “Oops, sorry about that. Sometimes my grip is stronger then I realize.” Oliver taunted him and Slade became enraged. He charged straight at Oliver and when he reached him Oliver reached out and stopped him. He turned the tables so quickly that everyone stared wide-eyed as Slade ended up in a choke hold.

“Your so stupid Slade. You will never learn.” Oliver cut off his air supply and Slade started gasping, his face turning beet red. When Oliver knew he was close to passing out he let go and Slade dropped to the floor. Oliver walked casually around to where he was facing Slade again.

Oliver knelt in front of him and Slade felt real fear. “I really thought you would be smarter than this and just leave Felicity and her family alone, but you couldn’t do that. So, what am I going to do with you?”

Slade could not talk as a coughing spasm hit him. His face was still read and before he could react Oliver threw a punch that knocked him back on his ass. Slade spit some blood out of his mouth and then he tried to stand. The men behind Oliver had been just watching the whole thing their respect cemented. Oliver stood with a cold smile.

“Oh Slade, don’t look so scared. I actually have a surprise for you.” Oliver nodded to one of his men and they walked over and opened a back-entrance door. Slade’s eyes widened as some of his family walked into the room. _What were they doing here?_

“You see you forgot to mention to your family that you were holding a member of the Kutler family hostage and threatening to kill him. Your family is not too happy about that. When I called them, they were quite grateful to me for letting them in on your little secret.”

Oliver nodded again and then Slade’s eyes grew wider as a detective and four police officers walked into the room. Oliver nodded to the detective who stopped when he saw Slade and a cocky grin crossed his face.

“Why Slade Wilson, just the man I wanted to see. My name is Detective Adrian Chase and you are under arrest for kidnapping as well as tax evasion.”

Slade looked at the man as if he had lost his mind. “What? Tax evasion? What are you talking about?”

Oliver laughed coldly again, “Oh I forgot to mention that didn’t I? You see the day your assets were frozen I contacted a friend of mine with the government who had connections with the IRS. They checked your tax history. It seems you have been stiffed the government of, oh I don’t know, six million dollars.”

John stood up as one of the policemen untied his hands and he looked at Oliver with a new-found respect. When he saw Oliver enter the room, he had immediately been worried that he was compromising his job as a therapist for him. But it seemed that Oliver had a few surprises up his sleeve.

Slade sputtered, “That is ridiculous. What about Queen? Look at my dead men.” He pointed frantically at the dead guards that lay on the floor. _If he was going down, Queen was going down with him_.

“Oh, that was self-defense, right Queen?” Chase looked at Oliver and then at the men in the room. They all nodded including Slade’s own family members. Slade looked around completely dumfounded.

Two police officers approached him and placed his hands behind his back to cuff him, reading him is rights. He let his rage at the situation show in his eyes as he looked at Oliver.

“You messed with the wrong man Queen. You will regret this.”

Oliver just smiled at him and then turned to his friend Detective Chase. He held out his hand and they shook hands as Slade was hauled out of the room. “It sure was good seeing you again Queen.”

“You too Chase. You know you missed your last session.” Oliver teased and Chase smiled.

“I will make sure to reschedule that soon.”

“Tell your wife I said hi.” Oliver and Chase hugged like two old friends.

John watched with interest and then Chase turned to him. “Mr. Diggle, can you come down to the station and give your statement?”

“Sure. Can I have a minute?”

Chase nodded and then gave Oliver another smile as a team moved in to clean up the mess. John approached Oliver and gave him a smile that told him he was taken completely by surprise.

“Well Oliver Queen. Are there any other surprises underneath those glasses and that button up shirt?”

Oliver shrugged. “I probably have a couple more left.”

“How is Felicity doing?

Oliver grimaced. “She is worried about you.”

“How did she take to you bringing in the police?”

Oliver sighed, “She does not know about the police involvement. She wanted me to bring Slade to her to handle.”

John frowned. “You didn’t tell her your plan?”

“I had to keep this low key.”

John laughed sympathetically. “Oh man, I feel for you when you tell her.” He shook his head as he walked out the door and Oliver let out a deep sigh.

Yes, this was not going to go well.

***

Felicity had been trying to immerse herself in paperwork to get her mind off what was happening. She felt guilt wash over her as she thought of Oliver handling this mission. _What had she been thinking?_ She had been so focused on just getting John back that she has immediately reverted to mob princess and now Oliver could lose his license if he was caught.

She looked up as the door to her office opened and relief flowed through her as Oliver walked through the door. His face was a little bruised, but he was fine overall, and she raced from her chair and threw herself into his arms.

“I’m sorry Oliver, I am so sorry.”

“Hey, hey, what are you apologizing for?” He wrapped his arms around her waist and stroked her hair as she pulled back.

“I should have handled this myself. I should not have gotten you involved.”

“Hey Felicity.” He placed his hands on her face so she would have to look at him. “I became involved the day I told you I loved you.”

She looked behind Oliver. “Where is Slade?”

Oliver stroked her cheek and then pulled his hands away. “He is on his way to the hospital and then to jail.”

She looked at him in shock. “What?”

“Can we sit down, and I will tell you what happened.”

“But Oliver I thought you were going to bring him to me?” She was a little flustered, and downright annoyed. She didn’t know why. She had been so worried and now all of her emotions were combining into the perfect storm that she could not stop.

Oliver saw the look on her face, and he could tell he was in for a fight. “Can we please sit down?”

“Oliver, I asked you to specifically to bring him to me. A message needs to be sent to his family.”

“What kind of message Felicity? That you mess with the Kutler family and you will die?”

She clenched her fists.

Oliver sighed, and placed his hands on his hips. Now he was getting annoyed. She was not even focusing on the fact that Slade was in jail. She had slipped back into _that_ world.

“What would you have done if I had brought him to you Felicity? Killed him? Tortured him?”

“I would have handled things.” She spit the words out with anger and Oliver could see he was going to have to handle this delicately.

“Felicity, you told me you want out of this life.”

“I do.” She said the words with exasperation.

“Then trust me.” The words came out a little louder than he would have liked but he was frustrated. Felicity gave him a look of surprise.

“I do trust you.”

“Felicity, after I left here, I realized that if I brought Slade back to you, that I was just feeding that darkness that you are trying so very hard to escape. I know what it is like to try to escape it. It is easy to be dragged back.” He softened his voice, hoping she would listen to him. “I contacted a Detective friend of mine with the SCPD on the way to Slade’s and we worked up a plan to have him and his men take Slade in for kidnapping.”

She looked at him in surprise as he continued. “I also contacted Slade’s family. You told me that they had no clue about his plan, and you were right. Out of respect for you they were more than happy to sacrifice Slade. He had become a liability for their family.”

“But how is a charge of kidnapping going to keep him locked up? He has great lawyers who can plea him down to nothing.”

Oliver smirked. “Not with tax evasion in the tune of six million dollars also added. Not to mention Chase is married to the D.A.”

She looked at him surprised. Oliver continued, “When you told me you were going to have his assets frozen, I contacted a friend of mine in the government and they looked into Slade. Seems he had not paid taxes for several years.”

Felicity was speechless. Oliver had completely turned her world upside down in so many ways. He took her hands in his. “Felicity, I love you with every single breath in me. I told you that I would turn back to that dark side for you if someone threatened you, and I can honestly say I would not hesitate. But I knew if I did that that this life would have won. You asked me about my career. I love what I do, and I promised you I would help you get out. Well this is how I do that.”

Felicity heard what he was saying, and she finally sat down on the couch behind her. Oliver sat next to her and held her hands.

“Felicity I knew that if I brought Slade back to you that you would do what you have always done over the years. But it was time for something different.” He squeezed her hands. “I think the only way for you to get out of this life is to change it.”

She looked at him confused. “What do you mean?”

“You want out of this life, then you need to change it form the inside out. No more killing.” He saw something dawn in her eyes as she heard what he was saying. “You need to take this opportunity to meet with the families and broker a truce.”

She had not thought of that before. “But how will that guarantee that I will get out? The other families could just take this as an opportunity to flex their muscle.”

Oliver gave her a look of conviction. “Chase has agreed to work with your family in whatever capacity you need him to. Also, once the families find out you are aligned with the Bratva, they will not dare cross that line.”

She looked at him in shock. He had only told her recently about the Bratva and the fact he was a Captain but how was that going to benefit her? “But you are not that person anymore Oliver.”

“You are right, I am not that person any more. But if what I went through can help you leave this life then I am willing to use whatever connections you need.”

“But what about your license. You just said….”

“This will not affect my license because I made my Bratva connections known when I got my license. I don’t advertise it with my business but the story of my time in the military is public record. My disappearance was in all the newspapers and when I came home it was national news.” He scooted closer to her. “Chase also assured me that he and the SCPD would work with us on this. You can trust him. He is on our side.”

Felicity’s head was spinning. There was so much take in, the least of which was that she might really be able to leave this life behind her.

She stood and walked to her desk. Oliver could tell she was thinking.

She finally turned to him and he could see confusion. “I need some time to think.”

Oliver frowned but he did not approach her. He could tell this was a lot for her to process and he still had more to tell her, but that could wait.

“I have some things to handle at my house today, so I will give you time to process everything.” He sent her a look that was pure love. “I love you Felicity.”

She watched as he turned and walked out the door closing it softly behind him. She sank down into the chair behind her desk and placed her face in her hands.

She heard the door open and close and she knew immediately that it was John. She stood as he approached her, and she hugged him tight.

“Thank god you are ok.”

“It is all thanks to Oliver.”

She pulled back and he could see the uncertainty on her face.

“You wanna talk?” John made the offer as he always did.

She sat down and then motioned for him to do the same. Maybe talking this out with John was a good idea. He had always been there for her and was her sounding board. He had talked her down off a ledge many times and had an uncanny way of putting aside all the bullshit and just sticking to the facts.

As much as she loved Oliver, he was too close to her heart. She needed a fresh perspective. She needed someone to reassure her that this could work.

John was like her brother and if anyone could convince her it was him. They talked for what seemed like hours and as he left and closed the door behind him it became clear.

She had some decisions to make.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is going to be the last chapter. I cannot thank each of you enough for the support and love you always show to me and my fics. Thank you for taking each wonderful journey with me. 
> 
> I truly hope you enjoy the ending.

**Two Years Later**

Felicity closed her eyes as she settled onto her lounger. She could hear the ocean waves just a hundred feet from where she lay, and the sound was relaxing and melodic. It has been two years since the day Slade had been arrested. Two years since she had made a decision that changed her life forever.

She wanted to say that since she made her decision things had been easy, perfect. But life was never easy and perfection was an illusion. But she could honestly say life had been happy and satisfying.

She remembered back to her conversation with John after learning that Slade had been arrested. It was a turning point for her. It was the moment she made the decision to finally change her life.

**Two Years Ago**

_“You want to talk?” John made the offer as he always did._

_Felicity sat down on the couch and placed her face in her hands._

_“Come on Felicity talk to me. What is going on inside that pretty head of yours?”_

_“Oliver has given me the key to escaping this life John.” She kept her face hidden, so she did not see that he was not surprised._

_“And that is a bad thing?”_

_“No of course not. It’s a great thing. A wonderful thing.”_

_“But?”_

_“But what if I can’t escape it? What if I try and I fail? What if the darkness has filtered so deep that I can’t escape it no matter how hard I try?”_

_John placed his arms on his knees as he sat next to her. “Felicity do you think the things that you have had to do because of this life define who you are?”_

_“I don’t know what I think anymore John. When I met Oliver, I only had plans to go to therapy and get out of this life. I didn’t plan on falling in love or caring for anyone.” She looked up and her eyes were slightly red rimmed. “I didn’t feel I was worthy of that.”_

_“But?”_

_“He completely took me by surprise in every single way possible. He made me believe that not only could I leave this life. But that I could be with someone who loves me. That I could have a family.”_

_“You don’t think you deserve those things?”_

_She paused for a moment. “Do you?”_

_“That is not a question for me to answer Felicity. I am your friend and because of that I will always see and believe in the good in you. That is what Oliver see’s too. Why can YOU not see that?”_

_“Because my father never did.” Her voice shook as she said that, and tears fell down her cheeks. “My whole life I was groomed to be the next Kutler leader. I was never told that I was deserving of having someone good love me.”_

_John took her hands and made her look at him. “Look at me Felicity. You are the strongest woman I have ever met. You have done exactly what you needed to do to make the best of the life you were born into. Now you have an opportunity to leave the violence and the murder behind you and live your life on YOUR terms. You get to live how YOU want to live. Not how others expect you to.” He squeezed her hands. “You more than anyone I know deserve that.”_

_“John?” She looked at him and he saw fear in her eyes. “What if I am not the same outside of this life and Oliver decides the new me is not what he wants?”_

_John gave her a loving, sweet smile. “Oh Felicity. That boy is so head over heels in love with you. He see’s the good in you. He see’s what you can become. You just need to see it yourself.”_

_She wiped her cheeks and gave him a small smile. “I can’t lose him John, and I can’t lose you either.”_

_He caught her eyes. “Where you go, I go. You will never lose me.”_

_She sat up and hugged him tight and as his massive arms wrapped around her, she felt a full surge of hope for the very first time. There had been glimmers and glimpses of it over the past few months, but now it shown full and bright right within her reach._

_John pulled back and gave her a loving smile. “Go talk to Oliver.”_

_She nodded and then stood and headed to get her things. She was hoping to stay with him tonight and as John drove her to his apartment later that day she twisted her hands in excitement._

_They had talked that night and then he had just held her. It had been the perfect way for him to show her that he supported her and the next morning they had made plans together. Over the next few months things had moved quickly and changed dramatically._

_Her meeting with the families had gone better than she had hoped. When the elders found out Oliver’s connections to the Bratva and that he was in Felicity’s life for the long haul they had all agreed to the peace terms that she laid out. Each family signed a contract of peace for the foreseeable future. They all agreed to Felicity giving up her place as the head of the family and her cousin had agreed to take over on a temporary basis. Felicity trusted her cousin Michael and after meeting him Oliver had agreed he was the right choice._

_Chase had worked closely_ with _them to ensure that Slade was sent away for at least 15 years and when his verdict was read Felicity breathed a sigh of relief. She knew with him behind bars that the families could really work towards a different Star City and she for one was excited to see where things went._

_Oliver had voluntarily closed his practice in Star City. He had earned enough money to live comfortably for awhile and with Felicity’s money from her family neither had to work for the rest of their lives if they so choose. She had moved in with him and they had spent the next year working to weed out the bad and get the families in the position to move forward and honor their agreements._

**Back to Pesent**

Felicity felt lips dancing along her collar bone and her lips curled into a smile as she stretched beneath their softness. She felt the scruff of a familiar jaw dance along her skin and the shivers it gave her were something she would never tire of feeling.

They had arrived in Aruba the night before and being able to just be together and enjoy each other was something they both were quickly starting to get used to.

“Did you talk to John this morning?” She whispered as he continued to kiss up her neck.

“Hmmm hmmm.” Oliver hummed. “He and Lyla got settled in their cabana this morning.”

She lazily wrapped her arms around his neck. Oliver was enjoying the sunkissed warmth of her skin beneath his hands and lips.

“So, Miss Queen. What are our plans today?”

Oh, how she loved hearing that.

“Plans? I was hoping we would stay right here.” Her voice was muffled but he could hear the soft sigh that followed.

They had been married by a justice of the peace just a few weeks after Slade’s sentence was announced. John, Lyla and Thea, Oliver’s sister, were the only ones in attendance and it had been just perfect for them. They were using this time in Aruba as a honeymoon of sorts, but Felicity was starting to realize that if he asked her, she would live here. This was fast becoming their own little slice of paradise and for the first time Felicity was starting to feel normal.

She hummed softly as Oliver let his lips glide across her own and then down her neck again. He nuzzled the tie that was between her breasts and then tugged it with his teeth. As soon as the sides of the bikini she was wearing fell apart and her breasts were bared to him he leaned back and looked at them with a predatory gleam.

“I told you that you don’t have to hide these from me. We are completely alone here. John and Lyla are more than a mile away. We are completely secluded.”

She knew that, but she loved teasing him and if he was being honest, he loved pulling those ties apart. It was like opening his favorite Christmas gift over and over.

Oliver latched his lips around a nipple and the sucking and tugging made Felicity clench her thighs tight. She arched her back offering more of herself to him and he eagerly moved over to the other nipple. They hardened underneath the heat and moistness of his mouth and when he tugged again and released it, she gasped.

Their want and need for each other had only grown over time. Each one now so in tune with the other that they could almost read each other’s minds. And Oliver did just that as he slid down her body and ran his tongue around her navel. She arched her hips, her body giving him an invitation that he never ignored.

He ran his fingers and his lips along the rim of her bikini bottoms and then looking up at her with turbulent eyes he tugged the ties at her hips. The small pieces that covered her body slowly fell away and she heard a small intake of breath from Oliver when he saw what awaited him.

She was so beautifully perfect. Seeing her body naked beneath him was always a gift and it was like the first time every time. He gently parted her legs so he could lay between them and then he lowered his head and gently swirled his tongue down the heated core of her body. Tasting her arousal always made him hard and he shifted his hips to a more comfortable position.

He ran his tongue up and down eliciting moans and whimpers from her when he swirled it around the aroused nub of her clit. He was so very good with his mouth and Felicity placed her hands in his hair to hold him to her as her body started to tingle and tense. He was quickly sending her into a spiral and when he inserted two fingers inside of her tight body pumping slowly, she slipped over the precipice into an intense orgasm.

She cried out his name and arched her hips and Oliver kept up his pace, working her through the ripples of pleasure that assaulted her. As she tried to come down, he finally relented and moved back up her body. She pulled him up into a kiss as his hand lowered his swimming trunks and he groaned when he entered her.

She moaned as he filled her fully and soon, he was moving inside of her. They kissed deeply their tongues mimicking the movements of their bodies and the friction of being joined slowly started to build the tension inside of him. He loved her so much and wanted to pleasure her one more time. He angled his hips and pushed up on his hands so he could work her body even more. He pushed deep and hard, and because she had not quite come down from her first orgasm, she quickly spiraled into another. When Oliver heard her cry his name again and felt her body clench around him he relaxed and it sent him over the edge as well. She wrapped her legs over his and held him close as he twitched and released inside of her. The feel of his scruff as he buried his face in her neck made her shiver again and soon, he was collapsing against her.

He kissed her lips softly and moved to her side keeping her close to him. “It’s only been one day, and it has been amazing.” She whispered softly as his hands traced patterns along her arm.

“Maybe we should buy a house here. I mean we could come here in the winters and just enjoy the beach and sand.”

“Mmmm, that sounds heavenly.” She snuggled closer and then she heard something in Oliver’s voice that she had never heard before. Uncertainty.

“Maybe we could bring our kids here one day.” He said the words so easily and she looked at him in surprise.

“We haven’t discussed children.”

He looked at her lovingly, but hopefully. “No, we haven’t. Do you want kids?”

“I have never thought about it. With the life I was living I was determined to never bring children into that environment. But now….” She paused.

“Now?”

She looked up into his loving blue eyes and a smile lit up her face. “Now I can actually think about a family. With you.”

He kissed her again and played with the ring on her finger. “I’ve always wanted two kids.”

She laughed. “Two? Really?”

Oliver nodded. “I have always wanted my child to have a sibling. I mean Thea was a pain in my ass, but I love her so very much. I can’t imagine my life if she was not in it.”

“Two. Ok.” She said the words agreeably and Oliver pulled her closer.

They stayed nestled against each other as the afternoon sun soon turned to evening and then evening to dusk. It started to get chilly so they both headed inside to close out what had been a perfect day.

They eventually did buy a house in Aruba and it closed just two days before Felicity announced to Oliver that she was pregnant.

The look on his face had been priceless and that evening as they lay together, his hand and cheek on her stomach she leaned her head back against the headboard and closed her eyes. She was the happiest she had ever been. She had a family. She had someone that loved her unconditionally and someone she could depend on and she knew at that moment, she would never be the woman she use to be.

She was hopeful and joyous. She was complete.


End file.
